Shocking results of the study of the causes of the decline in birth rate in Russia have been published.
It turns out that some villains give the Russians contraceptive salaries.

One day, a friend of work turned into a cheap apartment. He had no money and he took a loan at a wild interest. The apartment was completely destroyed and needed repairs. As we sit on the smoke bar, he approaches and says: help the heating pipes to bring. 6 meters long, no one. Will we help when we need? Come here tomorrow at 2 p.m. Why not at night? So there is a lot of people there during the day, and one guard at night... Don’t go to help, bad comrades.

I’m so old that when I pass by the grandmothers sitting on the bench at the entrance, I always smile and say, “Hello, girls,” and they all say goodbye. The situation is normal, because I live in this house for a long time, and the grandmothers are also constant.

And then one day, as I passed by them, I greeted them again and went on, and suddenly I hear one of them, apparently new and also deaf, asking loudly:

Who is this?

This is the house from the fifth apartment.

The Truth? ! to

He greeted all the women and smiled. The poor woman!

All the men are the same, the other man cried out.

At the age of 70, I finally became a man.

The documents must be signed and sent to the central office. There is a terrible grandmother sitting on the guard.

- This is for you on the second floor in the 23rd cabinet, ask the Alcoholic.

I go to the office and ask the alcoholic.

I am a bartender! This old man can’t remember!

My friend’s father somehow crashed on his 21st Volga in Tashkent to the road on which the court would soon go. All entrances are closed along the road. Here, a police officer flies to him and they begin to scream in the mathucalary, like give gas from here! faster than faster. The father tapped on the floor and chased, and after him the mint goes and chases, go faster! In short, the people were shrinking, waiting for a cortège... here the old Volga is wrapped with all its strength, and then it cried.))) so fast he has never been on the tachkent.

Observing the rapid increase in the number of smoking women, you understand that the word "chicken" in modern life has another meaning.

It was in Kiev in the early 1960s.
There was one family with nine children. Parents — simple plaster very wanted to give birth to the 10th, to get in addition to the order of "Mother-heroine" a large apartment, a car, a lot of benefits and all kinds of other useful things.
But here is the failure - Daddy is out, and the 10th did not work out. They decided to ask for help from someone else. They looked at his construction of the raft, offered him 1000 rubles (money at the time was considerable). He helped quite effectively.
Everyone got what they wanted and seemed to be satisfied. But!! Prorab was wretched and jealous and filed a statement to the court, in which he described the whole truth as it is: he said, the plaster deceived the state, etc.
The courtroom was full of battle, and when the sentence was announced, the people fell under the chairs and began to laugh.
The sentence said:
- in the actions of the accused there is no composition of the crime;
and 1000 rubles. have been recognized as unlawful earnings and must be recovered;
- since the child has admitted that the child is from him, to collect alimony from him until the child reaches the age of 18.

When for the first time in Russia they made a holiday on Christmas Day, the commander before the army told us: “Orthodox Christians go to celebrate, the rest – to the workplaces.” And then it turns out that there are no others...

My parents never bought. My father was well earned, and my mother, and the money somehow disappeared. They didn't save on food, bought things, went to the South every year, so probably. On holidays we have a house of open doors - relatives, acquaintances, acquaintances of acquaintances. My mother sometimes complained:

We spend money on guests and people on business.

For what affair?

I recently purchased Zippo!

They didn’t even see the sea and the pastries.

There are Gypsy!

When Sukharev was far over 50, he and his wife divorced and went to the young woman. Mother of Father says:

You can imagine what a cowboy! What was he lacking?

Maybe he was tired of pasta and wanted to see the sea?

I have 2 employees in the department. Take Dima and Zhenya. They were pretty friendly, they were. Dima went on vacation, and when he came back, I noticed that they became less communicative. Jennie began to avoid smoke.

I asked my wife why. It turned out that someone in the department was constantly wiping the toilet. But it was worth Dime to go on vacation and the toilet became relatively clean. When he returned, the trouble resumed.

Just as the criminals cry out loudest of all: "Hold the thief," the strongest of all in their "patriotism" try to convince the outcast enemies of the people.

For about six months, I involuntarily watched the life of the unknown to me Tamara Nikolaevna. She works (and lives) in the Volokolamki-Leningrad region. Her salary is 46 300 r., paid her regularly. Tamar Nikolaevna prefers cash. I didn’t get the prize for the past six months, I didn’t go on vacation. And I know all this because six months ago, Tamara Nikolaevna, when issuing a salary card, VTB Bank indicated my mobile phone. Thank you that she doesn't like to pay by card - otherwise the SMS would come out of the horn of abundance. Although literally the days, Tamara Nikolaevna tried to pay something for the first time in Peterochka for 629.27, but the operation was rejected. And then it is true, where does Tamar Nikolaevna know how much money she has on the account, if she does not receive text messages, nor can she get into the mobile bank. And she had 82 rubles on the card during the misfortunate journey to Fiaterochka. and eight copies.
And you could have blocked the SMS sender if my pay card wasn’t in the same bank. I have an SMS form. I am very uncomfortable looking at Tamara Nikolaevna. I am bored, I went to the department and wrote a statement, I ask, say, Tamara Nikolaevna to separate somehow. But a month passed, and yesterday Tamara Nikolaevna got another salary. Someone with work is stable.
(And I am still silent about Olga Pavlovna and Tinkoff Bank - these letters go to me. Olga Pavlovna issued a credit card from them and does not pay too well, the debt since May is about 38 thousand. Now it is offered to pay at least 5300 r., or there will be sanctions. However, despite all this, recently Olga Pavlovna increased the credit limit to 86,000 r. It is almost like Tambov.
You say protection of personal data.

Irina Rubanova

There are two classes in Russia: the poor and the poor. With the poor everything is clear, but the poor are those who seem to have wealth, but they have little and little.

I was always worried that my grandmothers were very confident. I’ve always said that if you haven’t called a master, never open the door. Also always the grandmother warned - they will call from the bank, loudly and clearly send this person to the telephone and all. Parents especially warned one more computer people.

A small clarification - my father is negative to the banks, the salary is always received in cash. He never had cards. And yesterday my mom calls and after my warning about new ways of scammers, laughing tells me: they call my father yesterday "from Sberbank", they say you have some suspicious payment from the card passed. My father has no cards. Well he replied to her, “Hospadi, I’m lying there! Are they all sparkly? Well there revived, we stop everything, only the code from the SMS dictated for confirmation. And he, in response, dictates to Beliberto, in short, my mom says that five minutes later, at that end, the tubes did not stand and threw the tube.

This is how I realized that my parents were vigilant. What I wish you!

A true patriot does not sell his country cheaply.

The idiots are saving.
The Ministry of Health decides to save money. Because they are foolish, the savings are foolish.
To begin with, they decided that once the doctor is taught twice as much as the nurse, then the doctor will cope with her duties. The nurses were discharged and the doctors were forced to carry out all the documentation alone. As a result, high-quality specialists are busy half the time with what a not-so-high-paid specialist can do.
After that, right as in the children's cartoon about seven caps from one sheep, the fools began to "saving" again. The doctor spends too much time on the reception (moreover, he smells for himself and for the nurse), let’s reduce the reception time. have reduced. Now almost all the time of reception a doctor who has been taught for 6 to 7 years spends on the work of a nurse who is taught twice as much. There is no time to look at the patient. For excessive consultation - punishment, fools are spared. Uzi, Kt, dead only the plate. for free - punishment for the doctor, fools are spared. As a result, the patients who did not receive help should quietly die to the joy of the fools. But the people "why" do not want to die and call an ambulance. And the challenge is a medical brigade, again - a high-paid. The driver, again, is not one of them. come and understand that the patient does not need an ambulance, and no one provides him with a plan. And the emergency is more expensive than the call to the clinic. That is, one challenge would pay for the correct and normal treatment, but the fools will save. Further, the ambulance or leaves the patient at home and he tries to follow the instances further, or, when the consequences of the planned "non-treatment" become... bad, he will be taken to the hospital. There are high-paid specialists, examinations and hospitalizations, where they carry out treatment that they could spend at home for a lot less money. But the fools are saving. And often after the examination they say - you are treated in the clinic and everything goes on in the second, third and so on. and specialists often in the clinic were not bad, but 12 minutes per patient, 10 of which are spent on holy - to fill out medical documentation. This is why fools don’t save money. And the worst thing is that these specialists in a few years will simply not be able to work normally. Here the documentation they fill will learn to the joy of the fools.

To thank a politician for doing something for the money of the people is the same as applauding a ATM for the money given to you.

This story happened when I was nine years old. During the summer holidays, we gathered together in a company of 5-6 people and walked, sometimes getting into all kinds of repairs.



In our village there were two secondary schools and a sanatorium-type school. At the end of this school was a small two-story building, where there was a boiler and laundry room. In that summer there started repairs, as I understand - repairing the boilers. Because they were removed, and the top partially dismantled the brick pipe to the roof level. We went there with the crowd, it was interesting. But there was no one there, and by eternal distortion everything was open.



We went to the roof to see what was going on. I don’t know who, but not me, the “genial” idea came to mind to go down the pipe. Everyone is afraid, but weakness can be refused. In order to be less puzzled, it was decided to climb in shorts. Good below still flowed water, although rusty and stagnant. It was done by everyone in turn. I think you can imagine what we looked like after such a trip))).



Not just Yuri. He was fat, not to say that he was a gyrobasse, but rather bitter. He was afraid to get stuck. And then someone came to mind an even more brilliant idea - to go down the pipe down the head. I’m just sure that this would have been done, but here Juric saved us, he couldn’t stand the ridicule and use in the pipe. And then happened what he feared – he stuck at the level of transition between the first and second floors. First he cried when he flooded, then he started crying, and then he started crying. I understand that at the age of nine all potential astronauts, pilots and representatives of other heroic professions, but still they remain little boys who are afraid to be trapped in a dirty and dark tube.



We called the military council right on the roof and decided to help. In fact, there were two options: throw a rope that we didn’t have, or try to push it. They found some kind of bamboo rod with which the electricians hang the wires, and began to push it from the top. Naturally, we couldn’t do anything, only hurt him, and he started screaming and crying even more. Here we were caught by a guard. I can imagine what impressions he had – a wattage of dirty boys and whispering in the pipe. Oh, we got it then, and there, and at home. Emergency workers were called, who dismantled part of the pipe and released Yurk.



After a few years, he stretched out and lost weight, but the nickname behind him remained - Jurka-pipe cleaner.



I often recall this story when I begin to talk about what kind of children now went, we weren’t. We were like that, we forgot.

I went to the Politics. As it happens before the exam, the stomach turned.

By the smell of shit, I found a toilet in the hallway.

I go in, it smells, it cuts my eyes.

Of the two pushes, one does not work and hangs a paper over it "do not mess."

But to the edge to the edge! Above there is a board, you can see that the shit stopped, and it is also on it!



Fuck, almost 20 years have passed, and it still runs away from this pyramid of shit.

I had so recently in a dream run away from a giant bear, the most terrifying thing was how he whispered loudly, I heard that whisper right behind my back, and at one moment I clung, fell, and he pursued me, still loudly whispering and knitting my teeth. At that moment I woke up, in complete darkness...but the bear was still here, it was said by his terrible whirling which did not happen anywhere, only a couple of seconds later when the brain finally woke up I realized that it was wildly snoring my wife ))))