bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №85467
 12.08.2013
We sit down and eat another pizza. The man says:
You just don’t tell my girlfriend that I can eat so much. The feeding!

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №85466
 12.08.2013
KJ: I went to the zoo with my kids, the kids were cuddling, feeding, screaming, cuddling. I hope the animals are pleased.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85465
 12.08.2013
I am a natural enthusiast!) I started washing dishes.. washed everything that got under my hand: both dirty and clean.. and even a bottle with dishwasher!!)))

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №85464
 12.08.2013
My son’s friends came to my son’s birthday. They cried crazyly, said everything at the same time and did not listen to each other, grabbed at the table, arranged wild pseudo-dances, drank everything that was crazy and demanded more, sometimes even fought each other. They behaved like adults.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №85463
 12.08.2013
Yesterday I moved a friend (bought a new apartment). 25th floor house. Apartment on 23. There are four elevators in the house. After we broke one of them, I was delighted by the phrase of a random witness who saw the car at the entrance with a bunch of heavy and uncomfortable things: "Well, guys, you have three lives left."

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №85462
 12.08.2013
[19:52:13] Dmitryand hello. Are you interested in earning up to 1200 euros a week?
See also. It is a matrix. There are only 3 matrices - the initial, advanced and final. For entering the matrix you have to pay 1,500 rubles. Once you pass all three matches, you get 1,200 euros. There is no kidding. We are part of a team of people who are not traveling on such network projects for the first year.
[21:08:43] Anfy: Do you give out your glasses and coat?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №85461
 12.08.2013
All Sunday I was thinking about what I wanted to do before the start of the working week. At the beginning of the third night I remembered – I wanted to sleep –

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №85460
 12.08.2013
Features of the Mazda Capella Wagon:
The antenna in the rear wing - how do not lubricate it and do not wipe it, a little dirt dust has hit and does not want to hide. The evil people in the courtyard were constantly chasing her. Then found a good man - broke it off at all to the fucking so that my head did not hurt))) ";

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №85459
 12.08.2013
From the forum of rats:

and Vaka:
Cyclicity
How would you describe this concept? It’s like a rat who wants to pull three pieces of a banana, and only two get into her mouth... And this rat sits in front of a bunch of bananas with two pieces in her mouth... but she’s not enough... and she tries to push a third in her mouth... and the mouth is only for two, one piece falls out. The rat looks, evaluates the situation and tries to squeeze the falling one, in the process of which the piece that she has squeezed before falls out... The rat quietly mates about itself, breathes, squeezes the falling one... one piece falls out of the mouth... But it does not eat, the enemy does not give up, you have to take three!
So 5 minutes. At the sixth minute before him, it seemed that while he was stupid, the rest had already eaten five pieces... and a bunch of bananas became suspiciously thin.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №85458
 12.08.2013
Anya: I mean, I caught the bouquet, and you haven’t paste the photo into your passport yet?

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №85457
 12.08.2013
From Habr:
xxx: I personally use hot keys on all OS.
yyy: "жы" and "шы" always write with "and"
Zzzz: You are confusing. These “ji” and “shi” are written through “y”, while “ji” and “shi” have been written through “y” throughout their lives.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №85456
 12.08.2013
Pope is hurt. After the aquapark.
WOW : WOW
Will survive before the wedding.
What if there is no wedding? Will it never survive?
WOW: No
It is a ritual.
WOW: in order to cure the insignificant wreckage, you must under the screams of unwilling guests for 30 seconds kiss the bride (preferably your own, in order to avoid getting even more extensive damage), then dance the gang style, worship a man, dress up as a woman, learn to wrap the doll, drink a drink from the elbow, drink from the shoe of the bride and be able after the celebration, at night, in this state to recalculate the gifted money and satisfy the bride (preferably your own)
Walk with the sick until the end of the days.
I am sad (

[ + 10 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №85455
 12.08.2013
Before I could not understand why my attempts to talk to a guy about our relationship, he called brainwashing. I started dating a girl and started to understand her boyfriend better.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №85454
 12.08.2013
Leni is:
I look at the wound.

Dickie Dudgeon:
Who are you and where did you bring Genkou?! to

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №85453
 12.08.2013
The Stranger: Walked around the children’s playground. We have different views about our own children.
The Stranger: Mom blames her daughter for throwing her stones.
Den Stranger: Dad insults his daughter for not hitting the target :)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №85452
 12.08.2013
From the authors of "Born’s Identification", new thrilling film: "Kernel’s Panic"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №85451
 12.08.2013
Today the builders will wash in the fountains and cling to the passers with the question: koshirme, bugul
Oh my asshole?

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №85450
 12.08.2013
The Thunder. The wind and rain on the wall. Lightning beats with envious regularity, announcing thunderstorms and warnings around the streets. And only a few male voices loudly, shouting the noise of rain and thunder, sing "Let the troubled pedestrians run through the lawns ".

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №85449
 11.08.2013
"I am your planet satellite!"
by Neil Armstrong

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №85448
 11.08.2013
Do you want to go to a nudist beach?
Anya: What would you look at if your cock got up on a tile? No, I do not want! And then I will remember!
to fuck.

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