bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №76807
 02.02.2013
XXX: And this mouse is strange. When she wants to eat, she doesn’t scream – she begins to furiously lust) To touch me with my mouth in my feet, to lie under my hands, in my face... And to murmur, to murmur, to murmur.

Wow, she’s in the vibration mode...


[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №76806
 02.02.2013
The Zenit-3SL missile crashed into the Pacific Ocean
nn:Russian submarine grouping of satellites on the bottom of the Pacific Ocean))

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №76805
 02.02.2013
The "end of the world" is not over! Lazy to go to the store, decided to open the bag, which the sister prepared for the occasion, but never disassembled. We found: 6 bins of olives, 2 bins of olives, canned calmar and chupa chops. Fuck, good that "he" did not happen!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №76804
 02.02.2013
Announced by:
- For a car BelAZ need two courtiers-Tajik.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №76803
 02.02.2013
Checking the mail through the web interface, I paid attention to the tiny advertisement of Yandex-Direct: "Buy a test scraping machine, other confectionery equipment, bla-bla-bla..." I remembered that the day before I looked at the Yandex market some products for baking. He went to the search engine of Yandex and scored in the search line of toxic poisonous substances strains of bacteria, immediately switched to the mail window and updated the page. The direct advertisement was also updated and issued: "February 9, the evening of the mud song" in Moscow, 19:00, the restaurant "Kalina Red". The stars are singing for you!
There is an artificial intelligence with a bright associative side and corrosive sarcasm. The future has already arrived!

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №76802
 01.02.2013
Only in Russia, a person who has acquired a Windows license and an office home can be called a diva!

[ + 55 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №76801
 01.02.2013
I wish the creators of all kinds of rapids and deposits there in the event of a nuclear war to wait a minute at the entrance to the bunker.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №76800
 01.02.2013
Very often tired of phone calls with questions
What kind of internet do you use?
Are you satisfied? How much pay? I.T.D
First I tried to listen, then I tried.
Respond, but they are hardened.
As if not culturally.
Throwing the phone is not beautiful either.
But one day, in one night, they called for the third time.
I had an idea. My answer was short "I don’t use a computer"
The operator was surprised but did not even risk continuing the conversation.
No computer no problem.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №76799
 01.02.2013
The neighbor is tempting me :)
XXX - Just came from her my cat smells of female spirits
XXX is MMA? and :)
YYY is AGA. and 4D :)
zzz - And if the cat came wet, it is already 5D-MMS )))

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №76798
 01.02.2013
From Twitter:

Elite programmers, vip, hourly, night, their coworking center, xp, dressed, scream, coding, possibly with a friend, couples in startups.

[ + 22 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №76797
 01.02.2013
zzz: I wanted to get understanding from the internet, so I introduced "understanding"
Pony, their mother, Mania

[ + 43 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №76796
 01.02.2013

Before recovery (since a week ago) the wife and Teach lost the voice and the maximum they can, this silently whisper!! to

Oh my God, what a grace!! to

Good luck to you guys.

Explain to me why you get married in a year to hate your wife?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №76795
 01.02.2013
There is a lighthouse on the street with cigarette advertising, on the front door - everything as it should be, on the back - a clean door, the advertisement has slipped.
As a result, the obligation of the Ministry of Health turned into a prophetic "IE KILL".

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №76794
 01.02.2013
I watch the movie. Snow and Homer
The persecution of biathletes? =) is

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №76793
 01.02.2013
Himba: Camoed is a very useful dog. Try somehow to get the child to wake up and say A! loudly when it is nearby. The Samoyed will immediately get stuck to see what is there with the child, whether it is necessary to protect him from any ugly, I don't know, wolves, or, I don't know, morge, maybe in the wheelchair so and used. Or suddenly the child froze in his wheelchair, wrapped in three blankets. And then you stand and think that you are a mother-echo compared to such a selfie, because you are in such a beautiful protective stand you will never get up, especially one hundred and fifty times a day.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №76792
 01.02.2013
The law: a professional wedding photographer can only consider himself when he is recognized by the pigeons at the ZAGS!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №76791
 01.02.2013
No, I knew women were avenging.
I was in the house of my wife's brother (G1)
xxx: brother's wife (g2) made a delicious snack, we sit eating

Fuck, I haven’t eaten so delicious for a long time.
Do you not cook at home at all?

The next day, J2 prepared the cake.

A delicious honeymoon, right?
G1: Yeah, Medovik is hard to ruin at all.

[ + 5 - ] Comment quote №76790
 01.02.2013
Reviews of Postinor
and Olga:
I have every morning
What distribution
(Brown, brown and bad
The smell, in turn.
falling girls
What can it be?
The Author:
The fucking?

[ + 11 - ] Comment quote №76789
 01.02.2013
A colleague says:

He has a cowboy friend. Every morning he drinks a bottle of condensed water.
Once they had a child at night, so he put his uncle in a cowardly rubber.
Cock went out of the sortir in the morning. He sits down and feels his ass finally slipped.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №76788
 01.02.2013
(from the discussion of Castaneda's books)
What do you know about unpredictability? Here we wandered like that with Serega on the market, some clever screwdrivers were looking for him. Returned through the ranks where they sold animals of all kinds, or simply gave. We pass by one man, in his box the puppies are squeezing, and here one puppy runs to the edge of the box stands on his back legs and catches Seregu for the sleeve. He stops, turns to the box, bends to the box and says looking into the eyes of the puppy: "It's a joke who is so brave here, here I'll buy you and put on a chain! ", the puppy tries to laugh on Serega, and crawl but from the edge of the box does not retreat, "And into the woods I will take it! " (he's a hunter), the puppy begins to jump strangely and tries to get out of the box in the direction of Serega, "Well, all the fox, played..." says Serega and climbs in for money...

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna