bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №71266
 09.10.2012
xxx.blin... saw in the movie cake wanted cake, saw pizza wanted pizza)

Look at porn.

XXX There is no food.

[ + 71 - ] [14 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71265
 09.10.2012
The Ministry of Health wants to raise the excise duty on tobacco 11 times. The average price of a pack of cigarettes at the same time will increase to 145 rubles. What about you, smokers?

Yyy: It is better to let the price of alcohol increase 11 times. I have never heard that a person who smoked half a pack of cigarettes then struck his smoking partner with a tail. And I never heard that a man who smoked three cigarettes and then sat behind the wheel would kill three people to death.

[ + 36 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71264
 09.10.2012
Sometimes, encountering women’s forums and seeing what nonsense they are writing there, I hear a grandmother’s thrill in real, looking at glamorous ladies, pink things not in place, etc. I am very ashamed of my gender.

[ + 41 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71263
 09.10.2012
>>> - at 23 years think that the breasts will still grow - the top of optimism))

On top of naivety to think that she will forever be the same size as at 23! As he grows up. First after birth, and then with inevitable weight gain with age.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №71262
 09.10.2012
Ndr: When I was still in school and there were no phones to do anything at a boring class, we came up with an interesting game called “Warlords.”
Both participants sit for one piece, put their hands on it, loosening their elbows to the sides. Then they try to clash with each other from the batch, use the elbows for this and thus "draw" a place behind the batch. The teacher who is thrown out of class loses.)

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №71261
 09.10.2012
In case of a break with the end of the world, I propose to postpone the Day of the Fool to December 21st!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №71260
 09.10.2012
xxx: Do you know that my mother's wife-wife has all the accountants?
YYY: Now yes and now?
XXX: I’m going to the dining table today. I’m sitting in the reception, yes.
XXX: I am going to go. And suddenly a voice from behind: Girl, I'm sorry, you're not from accounting?
yyy: ahahah this is fate
XXX: I thought so too. Then, when he answered, he asked why he did so.
xxx: and she said the murderous: Yes, you are a straight outlet accountant.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №71259
 09.10.2012
1 (the girl, declares): "I gave your opinion, and my reproductive organ was the axis..."
2 (interested): Well, well, well, here is more detailed! What kind of reproductive organ is it?
3 (does not know physics): It is known which; at least the magnetic axis must be there.
1 (inspired): Do you imagine the rotation of the galaxy in a spiral? In the center is a black hole.
(Everyone is presented on their own):
Understand what will happen in the Apocalypse.
2: yes, now the phrase "nuclear fucking" has become somewhat closer to meaning

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №71258
 09.10.2012
Do you remember the name of the South Park series where Kenny is killed?
YYY: I don’t know how to tell you.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №71257
 09.10.2012
XXX: Let’s remove the computer table and put a magazine. First, it fits the interior, second, it will free up space and third, you will play less in your tanks. We will kill three rabbits.
YYY: You will be one of them.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №71256
 09.10.2012
Today I will go to the pharmacy for the tincture of the puddle. The pharmacist aunt looked at me with a bit of a whimpering eye: What are you doing there? (They are on the street)
I am in misunderstanding. It turned out that I was the fourth in a row to come for the reassuring. We live well)

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №71255
 09.10.2012
On some torrent posted the film without translation, comments below:

Garila666: People are good. When will it be translated?
126 people jumped. Are you all Americans? How are you going to watch him?

Genabukin: Garila666, if it were not your message, I would be 127=) sps you =)

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №71254
 09.10.2012
A couple in zoopsychology.
Which dogs cannot be trained?
Students are dead.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №71253
 09.10.2012
Prehistory - bought home a waffle cake "Jack", after which we sat down for tea with my sister to watch a movie.

What are we watching?
I don’t know... let’s "live a dead man"?
Just cut off a piece of Jack first.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №71252
 09.10.2012
We split up very quickly, even for the present time.
Lying on the bed watching a movie, she said she has a big ass and fat butts. I agreed on the machine, and when I felt a stirring look, I decided to correct the situation, encouraging something like that I have a small member, say what? I am not worried...
He has survived now...

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №71251
 09.10.2012
>> it is a gas. Only a double.
<<<<
>> if the gas occupies the entire given volume, the cat - the entire given area

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №71250
 09.10.2012
Windows 7 is not powerful (the standard calculator does not even divide by zero!

Windows 7 is Chuck Norris Edition.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №71249
 09.10.2012
We sit with a friend (Andrei) in the room, we study his new cell phone, the father comes in:

What are you doing, young people?
I: And Android is getting along.
Father (in spite of a friend): How he just doesn’t call you...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №71248
 09.10.2012
xxx: I’m digging in Google, looking for a dress in medieval style. on one of the sites a cute dress, the time of the noble knights and the beautiful lady blabla, and then, suddenly, the color is determined by chance when buying. EFT, is it like this? then already noticed - "Race: All, Price: 11 gold")))

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №71247
 09.10.2012
TimeParadox: I tried Windows 8 Release Candidate and it quickly installed
Nitros: It seems that Microsoft understood
TimeParadox: What did you understand?
Nitros: What to reinstall the screw faster in case of a virus than this virus to remove and decided to speed up the installation
TimeParadox: 0_0 GENIAL

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