bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №156423
 11.06.2021
XXX: I have a friend. Such a loss is difficult to imagine. One day, he was stolen his phone, asking for my phone to call. As expected, not a subscriber. He decides to go to the police. We enter, take a pass, we are asked to hand over phones and other things that cannot be carried on the list. I gave my own, well, a friend, gets his jacket out of his inner pocket and also gives it to the officer. I think this is the quickest detection of a crime by our police officers. Even the statement was not accepted.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №156422
 11.06.2021
My 5 year old son asked for a sister. My wife and I explained, now there is no money, we subvert and buy. I came back yesterday, tired. I sit on the couch, my son comes in and screams at me:

Why don’t you work? ! to My sister lacks money and he is at home.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №156421
 11.06.2021
xxx: I once had a neighbor on the staircase, a young couple, 25 years old.

The guy is a small thin, and his girlfriend is generally an inch - a meter with a cap height and weight for the appearance of kilograms 40-45, the voice is quiet, thin.

So from them periodically sounded such sounds, like an adult bear with a dull knife cut into pieces, and he, why then, roars to the lord with the phrase "daaaaaaaaaaaaaa, eeeeeeeeeee, gooooopoddi."

I met this guy someday, I say - friend, you would be there quieter with a girlfriend somehow, I understand, the process is fascinating, not to self-control, but people are around, you do not live in the field.

And he says, “This is the cross, it’s not me, it’s the cross. The first time, he said, he swallowed himself, then got used to it.

The march did not lie - when they ran away, he left, and she brought a new man and the sounds were the same.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №156420
 11.06.2021
Take the advice as the rule: "Everyone is allowed to be wrong" - and you get rid of any disputes.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №156419
 11.06.2021
Very full aunt Olya, who always knows everything much better than others, asks little Masha with strict educational notes in her voice:
How good is your big finger?
Masha pulls her finger out of her mouth and answers:
He will not fill!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №156418
 11.06.2021
The mortgage was refused because of the low income, and the child benefit because of the high income. The middle class, the fool.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna