bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №96801
 16.04.2014
Discussion of events in Crimea at the forum with foreigners:
xxx: No, you just, apologize for the frankness, don't go into your discourse. In Africa, there are constantly bloody civil wars, you are for whom - for the Tutsi or for the Bushmen?
Yyy: Tutsi fought with Phutu, so for the case. It was the biggest genocide since World War II. And the Bushmen, they are not here at all, because in South Africa and Rwanda there is no side. This is to expand the horizon.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №96800
 16.04.2014
I give up my wife. Give or pay. Almost a new. Due to its character, it has only been used a few times.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №96799
 16.04.2014
I saw such a beautiful girl in the gym today.
A cat?
Which cat?
Have you seen the cat?
No no man.
Oh well clearly. You only call cats beautiful.

[ + 31 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96798
 16.04.2014
The Smart:

But why not include in the school program for work, for example, the ability to assemble a socket or in the algebra program to calculate the mortgage rate?
— — —
Someone told me that the Indians do not know how to think abstractly (I do not guarantee the truth). For them there is no tree, there is only an apple tree, or a tree, or some other concrete. Are you an Indian? You were told about percentages in algebra, about wallpapers in geometry, about rosettes in physics. Well, there were no code words "hypoteks, wallpapers, sockets", and IQ does not allow analogy. Fuck to...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №96797
 16.04.2014
I work as a drummer, my girlfriend is an economist.
and XXX:
The cry of soul
Forget me, I’m now forging the enemy base remotely, little of the stuff that sits behind it hindered me from playing the game, so when the base undermined (this is a normal phenomenon), this vegetable closed 1C and restarted the computer.
by 15:13:06

OOOU :
Cat, I really don’t understand what that means.
by 15:13:45

and XXX:
Primary
That’s when you write any financial report, I would tick you in the forehead with a pen, and when I thought about another thing, I broke it all and ran away.
by 15:17:45
And then came and stuck, and said "Huli is nothing ready yet".

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №96796
 16.04.2014
I was waiting for my story too. I am from the time when girls had "questions". I was a student, I come somehow to a friend, her 10-year-old sister extends a questionnaire to me. Because of curiosity, I read the previous ones. In one and found a sample - question and answer worthy of each other. The question is your wish? The answer is Podcast!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №96795
 16.04.2014
XXX: I work at home all day long, I need a background. Which series to sit on?
YYY: The Series "Ukraine" A difficult, unpredictable story. The polite people. Running on marathon distances. Always new heroes. The most realistic effects. I recommend.

[ + 38 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96794
 16.04.2014
A wild farce is happening. The head of the CIA is flying to Kiev in search of the missing black-water mercenaries in the Donbass. The men of Luhansk on "Nive" chase the fields of the rusted tank. Timoshenko announces the recruitment of his army of volunteers. In Kramatorsk, another army of bandits, dressed in uniform, loudly and recklessly attacks the airfield that no one needs. Degenerate Paruby calls Zhirinovsky and transmits a Kremlin warning. He turns red with his ears and shouts in front of the camera of the Ukrainian-Afghan journalist Najem, with whose message about the Euromaidan this whole cataclysm began. The men of Kramatorsk take captive the champion of the USSR in the Greco-Roman struggle, who was recently proclaimed the deputy secretary of the NSDC and sent to lead the operation to clean up civilians. He went out to the men as if in spirit to tell them that they were terrorists. The men believed and took him hostage.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №96793
 16.04.2014
>In Belarusian internet there is the word "like", "like"- "like"
In other words, it will be "sweet"

Then already, if you say 'pa-belarusian', "padabayka". "Like", respectively - "paciснуць падабайку", "smile like" - "tsisnni падабайку".
And the fashion word selfy was quite quietly translated as "samapstrick".

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №96792
 16.04.2014
With thanks :

Small tricks for every day:
— — —
I watched the Korean horror film "Karaoul Post 506". There is a scene where a guy cuts a bulb, wearing a diving mask.
— — —
Sometimes I wear glasses to not cry. Maybe the mask is better.
— — —
A little bit of yourself. I, for example, when cutting on an onion or singing or talking. No need for any tools.)

Thank you good man! Yesterday I cut the bulb - no tears))
(Author of the first quote)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №96791
 16.04.2014
have survived. Yesterday in the conversation with the girl used the words "post" and "post", when she entered 17(!An old younger brother, tolerantly corrected the "dorming dinosaurs": "It is right not to fast, but to post. You have a strange conversation."

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №96790
 16.04.2014
I’m doing bilingual work here... and you know what? The manner of building the sentences of Master Yoda is similar to the peculiarities of the grammar system of the Armenian language!

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №96789
 16.04.2014
Scientists have taught monkeys to speak in the sign language, and they can now communicate their thoughts to people.
yyy: After such discoveries it will be clear that they can be allowed to participate in the elections :)))
XXX: After these phrases you should be deprived of the right to participate in the election.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №96788
 16.04.2014
The most impressive thing I’ve seen from mistakes is the word “smokes” that my friend wrote in class six. No, not about a volcano or a cigarette, but about a bird. The question is "but how!?" he quite logically replied "that the fig will understand you with his rules - all the time I was told that "ca" can not be written, it should be "it", here I wrote".

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №96787
 16.04.2014
What do you think to give a loved one for her birthday?
Give her what she wants most.
In order to give her what she wants most, I will have to sell my apartment, all my internal organs, go into credit, rob a bank and still not have enough money.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №96786
 16.04.2014
In old age, the current glamorous blondes will not be filled with sand, but struts.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №96785
 16.04.2014
is
Modern English is very similar in structure to Chinese.

Myst
Tell me about it in more detail.

Iskander
The structure is similar to Chinese. and lightly.

Myst
This is much more detailed. thank you.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №96784
 16.04.2014
from ZH:
Russia was struck in the costume of Brijuni. And the Russian people recognize only the Watts.
- But many dressed Brijuni right above the Vatican.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №96783
 16.04.2014
and survivors

>Give me a clear answer at the last time I wrote a very beautiful and other unreadable and then...<

Thalia is a Georgian name. Well, like Danelia or Topuria there.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №96782
 16.04.2014
When a whole information agency completely blocks you the possibility of “not coinciding with the opinion of the editorial board” on the Crimea, putting all your accounts on a blacklist, in all social networks from where you can go to them, blocking all the niches that are not connected by their name, only then you feel that someone is listening to your words!
You are the enemy of the state.
And that! I haven’t even fought with Matt yet.

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