bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №101228
 31.07.2014
Well well. I am, I mean, such, on the federal highway, within the city, at a speed of 60, otherwise I cannot, in the flow of food, and here your body on the transit flies out. Well, you can get hot, you are on a zebra. And the sign, here it is, at the pedestrian (yes, straight near the zebra, not early, no!). How many seconds do I have to react and slow down? 5 is? 10 is? Behind it is a loaded fur. The same 60. And if I still get to slow down, she’s bothered. In the end, 2 cups. Not always everything is so unambiguous. And all the wise people are advised to sit in front of the car, drive a ride, and then we will talk.
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As long as the flow forms ebla, like you, it will be. Read the rules carefully, shit, everything is written there. I reflect on the "chuccha is not a reader": if you do not have time to react, do not rush. In the original "choose the speed of movement.... taking into account the characteristics....visibility... "And further on the text. The speed limit is the maximum, not the minimum. And yet, if you don’t spin the frog on the sides, you can see ALL the signs and all the markings, just if they were. But you, fucking, then on the phone, then on the girl, then the magnetic twist, here and fuck everything in the world.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №101227
 31.07.2014
Mathematicians, you are not allowed Lenin to die.

We approach the task this way:
1st We determine the area of Lenin's palm in any available way, well it is two-dimensional.
2nd Multiply the result by 100, as the palm ― 1 percent of the body surface area.
Three ? to? to
4 is Profit

With respect,
Graduate of First Honey

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №101226
 31.07.2014
Disputes about the PDD, the beat, the Lenin Square very strongly remind:
And now, if our lovely ladies remain silent for a moment, you will hear the HORRORY noise of the Hyagar Falls!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №101225
 31.07.2014
When they invent and cool clothes. I would buy.

[ + 21 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №101224
 31.07.2014
From Habr:
What is C++ programming better? Its defects are polymorphic, encapsulated and inherited.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №101223
 31.07.2014
Comments to the post on the chips about the dudes, arranged a pool in the apartment with the help of a film right on the floor.

Oyama: It is easy to fold. The hose in the window and sleep on the first floor.) all flows. Collect the remains in the cloth and also in the window.

Nikolai Moruncov: I think they can sleep in all the low-rise floors.

XXXL: In the third photo, the guy took the right posture. Visit the neighbors from below.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №101222
 31.07.2014
It’s okay when users ask to replace the toner cartridge in the printer, but when they call and report, “You know, we’ve gotten out of the powder in the cabinet...”, a lot gets into place.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №101221
 31.07.2014
Daddy burned the chicken yesterday. The chicken was domestic, so it smells in the courtyard and in the kitchen. the chicken is fried..mmmm... in the evening, my husband stands over the bowl, and asks me what kind of fish it is. I said to him: "It’s actually a chicken. But if you can’t distinguish a bird from a fish, doesn’t it matter what kind of fish it is.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №101220
 31.07.2014
On Monday, after two honest weeks of work, my first day as an unemployed person in the last four years came. I decided to take a week’s vacation. I woke up, washed, had breakfast, went to the dojo, played. There comes a message from some unknown type long ago added to friends no longer remember why: "No premium you this month! Don’t play at work!" And this was written to me by a man who launched Civilization 5...

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №101219
 31.07.2014
The punishment must be proportionate to the offence.
__________

In no case. Punishment is perceived as a price, not a punishment. And even with the inevitability of the problem, it becomes more profitable to commit an offence than to abstain. And this applies not only to the upbringing of children, but also to punishments for adult crimes, especially administrative. Look at the same car owners - the one who rides on red and then pays fines, perceives the ride on red not as an offence (which can lead to tragic consequences), but as a luxury for which he pays (the type can afford it).

The punishment should not be proportionate, but demotivating.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №101218
 31.07.2014
Every time you want to pull a child by the ear or give a necklace, imagine that you’ve stuck somewhere. And then a huge man appears, three times bigger than you, and pulls his ear. And then the backbone is like that! You won’t start to binge, but you’ll recover and be a normal person.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №101217
 31.07.2014
"Have you seen Gromozeka?
Tagged with"
Again the handless?? to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №101216
 31.07.2014
What about your new cleaner? It burns like the previous one.
The Aigle? She was fired.
O O O O?? to
- Quote: "Please forgive me when I scratched accidentally fell this leaflet and got into the mouth of the scratch and fat."
It was written in the lease contract.
Fin, the director, as it was, immediately calculated her to the fucking.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №101215
 31.07.2014
Talk about everything led to the discussion of the pops, in frequency - Bieber.
One Comrade :
-And yet the girls are pulling on him...Here is my cousin, small in height and weak. As a child, as a youth, the girls always followed him with taboo. And now... lucky fucking.
And you what?
- Well... to me, however, every idiot is always on "You" appeals.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №101214
 31.07.2014
from Twitter, riot between Ukrainians(s) The Russians (R)
Call us all ukraini, evil ukraini.And be sure to wait for guests, as they say in the legends, we took Troy, we will take Moscow.
The R1.And stand up! Brad Pitt has taken the Troy! Or was there another movie?
The R2.Okay, and Troy is okay. They also built the pyramids in Egypt.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №101213
 31.07.2014
I want an arbre!
Go and buy.
Wife: I can’t eat it with my daughter’s allergy.
Buy and eat under the blanket.
"The sound of the closing door"

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №101212
 31.07.2014
I have always been a trio in history.
It has been in the club of historical reconstruction for almost 10 years.
But drinking in historical clothes with knights from authentic tanks is a little different than a history exam))

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №101211
 31.07.2014
I have an internship (internship) at an Israeli hospital.
You know, I am now on surgery, today I was put into the operating room. Handles I have are inexperienced, so I usually hold retractors, maximum subcutaneous fat. And today we have taken our heels. He is well over 70 already, the technique is relentless and time-tested, he does not even use a coagulator. So, he let me, foolish, and cut, and fascia sew. The next day, at five minutes, I pleased to stumble, congratulated me on the first hernia and rejoiced that the patient survived) This is what I have to do - now I can honestly boast that I operated the hernia, and I was assisted by a real professor from San Francisco ;-)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №101210
 31.07.2014
Summer is the time when you sit under the air conditioner.
XXX: in the shell
XXX with ice cream
XXX with hot tea

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №101209
 31.07.2014
The worst feeling for a programmer is when ten people are around you and everyone is trying to find the cause of the problem in your program, and you already understand what the problem is, but you are afraid to say because it is something crying stupid.

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