From Habr:
Any joke about Schrödinger's cat can be funny and ridiculous at the same time!

Fuck people help my friend iPhone 3G cat from the table dropped now the screen white! What to do?? to
Please in the face!! to

The xxx:
The cat is out ?

< SASA > jbln
< SASA > do you know how to play a counter strike?
< djbln > I’m a dude!
< SASA > about how

A: I have a strong suspicion that the talismans for the Olympics were drawn by the same person who is drawing gifts for VKontakte.

cleaning the room very well helps the lost piece of hashish

Amateur fishing in Russia will be paid
They wasted at all!! Fools are fucking! Like cheese in oil, they ride in their heads, and from a simple man on the rust and the rope attached to it, for whom this last joy remained this fishing, because the other joys because of these mountaineers in power are unavailable to him - from him they pull money to the palaces.

Sorry to hurt.

My wife just cooked a huge pot of borst. I put it on the balcony and cooled it. We have a bear here. And the cover on the pot is not native, from any other pot is smaller. It clamps there on the edges of little and little and, scuco, screams on the wind, irritates... And I watch hockey.
I went, took the jacket (the one that the shoe glued). I’ll press the cover. And she, scuco, turned, the edge failed...and the hammer in the borst broke.
There is a boiler. I’m in panic, I’m running after the squirrels.
I tried to catch the pen of the hamsters - he also fell into the borst and the plate-gubbers.

I sit in the kitchen and watch hockey. In the struggle - the hatchback and squatters. Only I know that.

How to tell my wife? The shoe was glued to the floor, now this too, or it will suffocate in a dream, or it will poison.

Jumping with a parachute.

yoker: and we have one lady jumping with her dog, well, a small one, decorative.
During the free fall, there was a beautiful shelf behind them.
One thing I can’t understand is how this dog went into shit twice as much as she did herself.

Nyquist
You have a nickname on the portal.

Tarakonas
I go there on behalf of my wife. Not registered himself.

Nyquist
Literally

Nyquist
Have a wife too.

Do you remember my neighbor’s guitarist? He is very good, he is confident in his goal.
Is he playing like Kurt Cobain?
XXX: Ah... so he’s learning to play??? And I thought he had a foolish goal of me!!! to

Yesterday at the stop on Jubilee street was left a netbook samsung pink small in a pink blanket. It contains my master's thesis.No other copy.Return a great reward.Please click I like it suddenly helps

Lost Shadow: 169 km per day on a bicycle - it is possible. You are cool :)
Mad_sanity: Listen to one very wise thing, my friend...
Mad_sanity: I was bored.

Fuck, I’ve turned off the water.
I will drown.
...
and fucking (

My mom and I have the same phones, and for the first time in 2 years we confused them. I sit at home and the phone rings. On the display is written Denis (my mom’s brother), and I think it’s my ex. And I raise the phone with the phrase: "Well that h*ylo, did you think?"

Fuck Google, ask me!
Stanislav: The words didn’t confuse, didn’t they?

A six-year-old Finnish girl, Helga Hiltonen, wrote a letter to God to give her 100 marks before Christmas. In Finland, letters with the wrong address can only be opened by the President of the Republic. Thus, the letter addressed to “the Lord God” was read by Urho Kalev Keckonen, who successfully ruled the country from 1958 to 1982. Keckonen decided to comply with the girl's request, but thought that 50 marks would be enough for such a small child. He ordered her to bring her money and a letter “from God” on his car. Soon a letter from Helga came back to the office. She wrote that the president’s car, which had stopped near her house, was covered by the whole street. The girl asked God not to give any more money through the president because he stole half of the money.

[20:55:06] <Terentius_Palych> CBuHKo: family ent kad the older sons are punished, for a broken mirror in the living room and you give chocolate only to the daughter..and going through the minute 5th to wish a peaceful night, all friendly warm: a peaceful night, dad..

Please do not confuse happiness with joy of dementia.

I go fucking to work on Friday (it was October 2007). He calls for help and asks: "Lieutenant! And you judo?"Well, I say to him: "When home one yes, say, "Shorter, it is he shouts to me, tomorrow the competition of Kamchatka judo, you need a couple of men from the crew...You lieutenant, here you will go, cheat, to defend honor and pride....Well, I came to Petropavlovsk the next day...As long as I was found a kimono, I ask, how did I get bored? I think with the scream KIA fucking foot in the fucking and this is the victory!!! Ann no, fucking skinny, judo is fucking a fight without a fight, fucking her a horse!!! I'm screaming, you're not saying, there is no one in your super lightweight weight category, you'll get a diploma and get home! Well, I was a fool and I believed... Atam with me 4 people, of which one candidate and one master of judo fucking sports!!! Fuck, I think it’s done!! I fell shorter on the KMS... Continued 30 seconds, after which the planet sharply increased the speed of rotation, the ceiling turned and I from all the way wrapped up with the shoulder on the tatami and immediately stabbed with the foot on the deck, well the shob was not killed to the end.... As a result of our weight category gave one 3 place for two and a letter where the black on the white is written that I took 3 place in the competitions in the Judo of Kamchatka region!!!!! Hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole, hole :)

We now have pennies running on the streets.
DrDom: Who is running?? to
The Pooh: The Pooh.