At the entrance to the entrance, he stopped and was attacked by an important lady, who, whitened by rage and whispering on the whole Grain Street, shouted, "How dare you smoke here?"

I was alarmed by the appeal to "you" and I asked very politely where she came from.

"I live here and I will not tolerate that different people smoke here", the lady replied and began to mourn further.

I humbly asked in which apartment they live, because something I do not remember her, although I also live here, for a long time.

The lady said, “Remove me from here, bomz.”

Here I experienced a cognitive dissonance, took out the key and went into the entrance. The lady rushed after me with a scream – "Don’t shut up, shit!!and "

I said that I could not let strangers into the entrance and I closed the door.
While I was waiting for the elevator, she was still in it.

Yes, I am tough.

While you all look with your mouths open and loudly discuss Crimea and Sochi, the deputies slowly under the noise accept laws and amendments that will not let us live... so develop a habit, if there is some noise on the television - that is, until people are awake, the mafia wakes up...

I came back from the hospital again. As I realized, doctors have only two conditions:
"What do you wear with these little things?"
"What are you doing?"

There are all sorts of inquiries in Balin's personal office. In particular, there is a survey about mobile fraudsters and one of the questions - does the operator protect you from mobile fraudsters? Options of answers:
It protects
does not protect
something else
My operator is in conspiracy with mobile fraudsters.

Why is there no point "my operator is a mobile scammer"? After all, the connection of the unnecessary service quietly nothing but fraud and will not be called.

From the series: "Showed"
I came with my husband to the dentistry clinic, to treat my husband’s teeth under sedative anesthesia (This is when a patient suffering from tooth pain is handled not only by a dentist armed with a bunch of terrible glands, but also by an anesthesiologist. Therefore, the patient during torture sleeps, and does not torture himself and does not torture the doctor. I am as an accompanying person.
In our case, Dr. Son was not only a professional in his business, but also a humorous comrade. We go to the office, to a meeting with the anesthesiologist: - Good morning, why are you coming to us?
My husband replied straight: I came to sleep.
The anesthesiologist catches up the topic: Is it with Marina Yuryovna? He points to the dentist waiting in the chair. My husband cries.
Anesthesiologist concludes: Marina Yurievna is waiting for you, well, and your wife... please wait in the hallway!
I was sitting in the hallway, thinking: somewhere I was fooled or I seemed...?)) When her husband woke up, the first thing she asked was, “Well, what?” How did you sleep with Marina Yuryovna? Naturally, the answer was the male classic: Dear, it’s not what you think!!! to
In fact, thank the doctors.

She sat down on a coloured bench, spoiled her sweater and jeans, which she bought instead of those in which she sat on the coloured bench last year.

XXX: Oh three, the bird three.
The hunter does not chase the pigeons.

The noisy neighbors:

111: A good subwoofer works 5-6 floors on the stand

222: Have you closed the entrance door yet?

Vasex: We urgently need a corporate psychologist for the company!
Sashok: I agree that when he boils up, you can go to the room to relax, fill him with a moustache, and then calmly take up this messy job again))

<XXX> It was strange to live... a Gypsies stood at the railway station, asked for a little bit, promised happiness. I said that there is no happiness and health in this country. With the words "You are right" she went to ask others %)

xxx: I have a lot of movies and pictures that I don’t even have time to watch, but they take up a lot of space. Can they be compressed heavily with a backup so that they fit on the smallest disk? It is not necessary to restore them later. I am unlikely to look at them.
YYY: Shift + Del

to this
The child (10 years old):
What kind of actor does Chuck Norris play?

I immediately subdued—what, again the Handless?? to

Elly: It was last summer. I am sitting on a bench in the park, such a little girl, warm up in the sun, waiting for my faithful. And as usual, my luck works - literally from nowhere, a drunken guy in the style of "hop" comes out. He comes to meet me. Posted near the bench, bleached something, finally issued a member question - who am I waiting for here? Hearing that I am waiting for my boyfriend, the guy apparently decided that he was unobtrusively sewn off and said: "Oh! And the guy is also a boxer, probably?")) I honestly answered – "No, the knight". And what "?“" And then he was so kindly knocked on his shoulder from behind. He turns – and behind him is my unseen standing. Just returned from the roll) Cutting the seedling in the shoulders, in one hand a helmet, in the other - a tail (only taken in the battle) and a collar in brown spots (accidentally the paint was spilled, but only I know about it))). And politely says, “Well, I’m a knight. Gopnikek looked at him from the bottom up, apologized and disappeared. I’ve never seen people shake up so fast ?

And suddenly, in its time, Christianity (or any other religion, or even all the present religions in general) also appeared as a pillar over something else?
""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
You will not believe! In short, the new covenant will follow over the old.

Comments on photos of newborn cats posted on the forum

zzz: Photographs have a special value because they clearly show cat buds. It is known that they exist, but it is unrealistic to find a bud on an animal that has already grown wool (I have made numerous attempts). Here are the cats and their puppies.)

What is Spring 2.0? It’s when the flowers and other greenery under my window in the shore are ripping out of the snow...

If you want to look like a professional – always say "nuow, it was predictable", right after THIS happened.

Valko
Directly on the topic of Omsk cheese

Omsk is a tough city.
Earlier this week, a thief struck one of our Greffov shopping complexes.
He broke the glass... While it went down, it was all cut off...
Bleeding into a Sex Shop... Eat Viagra...
He pumped a rubber grandmother... During the operation she broke out of him...
He was upset - went to rob the other departments... where he was caught...
Only a rubber member was from the kidnapped.
Yesterday, the security guard showed photos from the scene of the crime...
Atlanta is
and shoot :)

A friend writes:
When I was in school, we were asked to draw, for example, seasons, patterns, natures... and now what? Yesterday, my son had to draw at the ISO class "The ocean bottom after a nuclear explosion".

Uncle and Brrr! At our dog forum, the girl asked: “And the exhibitions in Crimea now are to whom to relate – to the Russian Federation or to Ukraine?... I came to the moment when the moderator has already removed the first 200 messages of the flag.... and where is this world?
The most injured was an innocent girl, who was banned for 2 weeks for burning a flame.