xxx:) haha, I, one morning at the exam put 4 machine, home was to drive lazy, I went and from boredom asked to try to pass on 5. And then I barely achieved a reduction in rating back, because I stayed on the back (there is nowhere to go, can I sit here?) He told the others.

One of my acquaintances, a very middle-aged lady, was stopped by a haishnik in the care of moving. The "Lieutenant is like that. Why are they not attached?" -"Yes, Mr. Police, I just pulled off - the eggs to fix". A storm of emotions spread through the face of the officer, the right fell out of the hands of the curved body, which, entering in the attack of historical laughter, tried to show, pass faster. Easter is

Connect the mouse)
Basaka: I have no place to take a mouse
Tag: catch the fingers

The EU urges Russia not to block gas to Ukraine because of non-payments, as this could raise doubts about the reliability of Russia as a gas supplier in Europe.

XXX: I wanted to get a TV. I went to a home appliance store. I chose the TV. I go out. Stop, tell me where the payment is?
The psychic. Throw the TV on the floor with the words "unreliable you shop, go to x@y!". I went looking for a shop. This will be an anti-advertising. To know.

He was deprived of sex with the words: “You have a constant temperature, and coffee has the habit of cooling.”
Now I know everything.

With "response"
The female must give birth, but the male does nothing. Will the female survive? both cockroaches
What does a female cock look like? :)
2nd day: Ic. and. Are the cockroaches giving birth? And the females??? The Atas!

Add to:
The young cat for some reason panicked when he saw a girl on his heels. The girl didn't melt, the shoes were the most ordinary, no twists, and he was on half-swinged slopes, then ran, jumped, and metal so until the shoes were removed. Why this panic, I never understood.
— — —
Last summer, I bought watermelon, brought it home, pulled off all the hands. He took the laundry to the bathroom, put it on his shoulder, the cat slept quietly on the washing machine. As I saw the watermelon on my shoulder, shrugged, swallowed up, stumbled into the door, crashed into the wall of the corridor and hid behind the refrigerator. I sat there for half a day, not lifting my nose. And when he came out, the half-eaten peanut did not even deserve a glance.

I read the "Fenimore Cooper’s Beast ". I came to this phrase: "...in the light between the leaves looked an unusually nice young female face, and so close that the Beast could reach him with a beast."
I have only one question: why?! to

picture with the inscription "I love space, there is quiet and no problems"

The comments:
HH: Well, it’s really quiet there. There can be no sound in the vacuum.
In Star Wars, you can hear how lasers shoot, ships explode and fighters fly. So do not spread your pseudo-scientific beliefs here.

I sell cameras. There are ladies 45 years old, they ask about one camera, about the other, I explain - the difference in the presence of an ocular detector, that is, under the eye.

Being in the camp of the defeated, you get the opportunity at least for a while to find yourself in the society of decent people, because all the fools have long since joined the winners.
A. of Gromov. Area of Justice.

Situation: the bedroom, a neighbor with a notebook sitting on the upper bed, I with a notebook at the table three meters away, there is Wi-Fi in the room.
I: Cole, come down, let me show you the solution.
My neighbor, I am lazy. Maybe through a Skype conference?

Survived...

Small to second grade HPI. We don’t get the scholarship, we can help.
But Kharkiv city is large, temptations are enough, and cash is not.
We discussed the options on Skype and agreed that
A student of a political school is the optimal option - "secret buyer" in a network of bordels.

The word "chevalier" (chevalier) originated precisely from the French same "chval" (cheval, horse) and literally means "the rider". That is all right, the French peasants called horses -))))
and...
The French asked the peasants for horses to travel to Paris. How do you ask if you don’t know Russian? Naturally, repeating "shval, shval" and throwing a finger at the horse. The peasants, when they saw another Frenchman at the threshold, said, “The swallow has come again.” So it went. From there, the word "sharomyzhnik" is a distorted French "sherami" = dear friend. A "Shantra" appeared in the epoch of the bloom of the fortress theaters: so they called those who were not suitable for the opera (in French, шантра pa = will not sing).
Interestingly, all three humiliating words are on the letter "S".

I am a girl who works as a salesman in a 24-hour car shop.
At night, heavy rain, a guy knocks at the window:
Girl, do you have tires?
(And the tires on the ducks just brought yesterday).
How long are you?
What do you have, in size?? to
- Of course, you can take a straight sample.It will be long-cut.
I extend the roulette to him.
His eyes were rounded:
I asked about condoms.! to

Duke Nukem: What about Japanese advertising? There is a different mentality and mindset. Show them our advertisement, where the suicide rate will soar by 146 percent.

"We have an average person can not afford a mortgage at wage at all."
Believe me, you are not losing anything. My friend in the loan in the bank was refused, he never understood our phrase - "God has protected you."

Time heals wounds, but does not smooth wrinkles.

To discourage the little daughter from climbing into the closet and moving things, I said that there was a evil uncle sitting there. One evening I was watching TV with my husband, she goes into the room and asks, "Daddy has gone out of the closet?"
I convinced my husband what...

They say that God created every creature in a pair... I am ashamed to ask, “Nobody has seen my creature?”