I will probably go to sleep, young Padovan - lack of sleep leads to rage - rage to the dark side of the force... the Jedi cannot allow this...

Customer: I don’t know what I want, let’s try different options with your designer!
Manager: Working with a designer costs 1500 rubles per hour.
Customer: You have broken up! Prostitutes are cheaper.
Manager: Here are different options with prostitutes and try it!

Brothers of Belarus and Ukrainians! Don’t you like your jumping there dollars, prices and so on? Come to us in Moscow and remove the residence of gastarbayters.

Wife to husband:
When you want sex, I’m just a rosette for you.
The husband:
You are a rosette, and a good wife is a trio.

Morph: I work in the adjacent (M+G) gym. The coach decided to crack: she broke into the hall in a crying mask and a black balloon. And although the image was unfinished (there was no knife), the attempts to escape from the room directly on the cycling machine were clearly recorded :) The motivation that...

I recently went to work as a construction assistant, so the master says:
- What a good assistant you are, the solution ends new you make, the brick on time, the tools you serve, everything on time.
- "Of course, three years in the line for the sapports played".

From the car forum: Everything is done, the choice of car stands is made. After reading a lot of comparative tests, having spoken to a bunch of people, the winner was the costume of a hot bird, a daughter on September 1. This topic can be closed, thank you all. and :(

Wolf: I wonder why all my acquaintances who portrayed themselves as lesbians at the age of 14-17 at the age of 20-25 got boyfriends/husbands.
Colchis is elementary. They just couldn’t make a timetable with their partners to alternate brainfucking'a. None of them wanted to be passive.

The film, which has grown up several generations of TV viewers, in connection with the new law "On the protection of children from information harmful to their health and development", which will come into force on September 1, has fallen into the category "18+", and will be postponed in the TV program to late in the evening - after 23 hours.
Fuck the comrades! Well, well, very, very much harm to the health and development of children is causing!

On the escalator in the subway today in the morning peak:
Check-in at the escalator: "Passengers! Take the left side of the escalator".
Releases the microphone, and then the recording with a male voice: "This can lead to your death".o_0
No one paid attention, but I laughed from the heart.XD

by Ekaterina Trawkin:
I remember studying. For example, I was given an account with an automate on pharmacology on the topic of "Narcotics of plant origin" Prepared by: TRAVKINA E.E. It is :)

GreenQ 21:55:57: Today neighbors drilled the wall at 9 in the morning
GreenQ 21:56:18: and behold, at nine in the morning they wept her and calmed down, and then the whole day was quiet.
GreenQ 21:57:26: I’m going to play the violin.

I am looking for an apartment in your house!
The size is not important, only the price.
Sunset is normal too.
Let the room alone.
Machine to wash clothes.
A table with a chair is needed.
Refrigerator to store the salad.
A dish to prepare dinner.
I don’t watch TV, I don’t watch it.
My cell phone replaced my home.
I want a balcony, I smoke.
I haven’t drank vodka in my life.
Ready to pay 20,000.
I can make twenty-five.
I am a simple guy, I am 19.
Can the student accept?

c) Tim Woo

at work :
Sasha is fired.
xxx: I know
YYY: from where?
You said yesterday.
YYYYYYYYYYYY I am tremendous...

Conversation with a work colleague:
Sasha, what is your car?
Why do you ask? You see the keys on my desk every day! Is that what they are talking about?
-Logotype "Opel" like
So what?...
What is "no and"? I have a world of tanks. That doesn’t mean I have a tank.

My cat is romantic. He learned to climb into the closet, where there was a vase with dried roses. Now at night, he forges the blades out of the vase and distributes a flat layer on the floor.

I work at McDonald’s. My husband and I are on a break and smoking. Suddenly, because of the corner from the point of issue of the MacAuto leaves the car. The driver is a cute girl. It already eats.
These people are driving, they don’t look at the roads, they crash.
See also: AHA Happy to fuck. Meat, blood and intestines.
The potatoes.

News on Yandex:
"The Navalny factory came with a search"

This is where they are stamped!

Today in the newspaper wrote that they decided to demolish / transfer the monument to Peter (Ceretel). Last time, this project was estimated at a billion. I would like to ask the respectable officials: Are you totally ugly, hateful? Do you know, shit, what reason to waste money?? to
In Moscow, people walk in the water after the rain, because the dumb Tajiks do not do drainage and because the water does not go away with the tile adored by the mayor! There is no place for money, right? Sssuki, build a house at the expense of the city, give apartments to veterans, heroes of Russia, stupid bombers, fools! Give benefits to budgeters. Don’t be the ultimate haters, fucking!! You have made a life for yourself, struck on yourself, children and grandchildren, do not bite, fool, grandmothers on the people's estate.

I found an old toy in the warehouse. Something like a Nintendo game from 1983. Well there are browsers that before Mario was still there, shooters... Corresponding graphics, joysticks with "half and a half" buttons.
I decided to play, to encourage, so to speak...

So these spiders, mushrooms and all the other stuff still eat me at the first level!!! to

Well, FIG, I’ll go to WOW, I’ll bite somebody.