From Twitter:
My father bought a ceiling luster with an MP3 player. USB under the flash. by Facepalm
So I hear the screams of the neighbors "Make the lighthouse quieter!and "

From the comments to the video, where the author turns the extender into itself and receives endless electricity:
Denis Kotov: Fuck, it is real for people to do nothing, everybody already understands that the stuff is full, and there are more and more of them every day. Why all this?
SoundExt1: You fool, I asked so all the apartment and house, and you sit and pay 3 thousand for electricity every month!
VovaNDWWW: fucking yes I so the whole neighboring microry asked! Now I have money for that!
Q: Please tell me what’s the secret? I do not succeed. Is it different which extender to take?

Krasov: As a software developer, I draw the attention of the customer who wrote the "final TZ": when submitting the project, any phrase like "And let’s do almost so" - increases the cost of the project by at least 20%.

A comment to the vacuum cleaner in the innet store.
Pissessos is just a bomb, I have grown like an elephant, I have washed carpets with the help of the ego, the couches are now like new.After cleaning there is no dust, no dirty air.So everything is great, minus I do not see yet.
Tagged with: "pics" It is terrible to imagine this process.
Vitaly: Equipment can be used in different ways... If the customer is satisfied with the purchase, then it is good...

My five copies.
Brabus: How can I explain to my girlfriend that I wipe the monitor with her pads not because
That I am a perverse, and because it's comfortable?

___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Go and buy your own clothes in the store.
You will have your clothes, jealous of your girlfriend.

My husband and I decided to save money.
One day I said, say, stop eating shurma, money is a pity.
So now, when I call, he says, “Let’s talk home, don’t waste money.” I - "I am not spared on feelings." - "And what about my feelings about Shaurma?"

No Signal
Thanks to Lingvaleo, I learned that the flower from the cartoon about the mermaid turned out to be KAMBALA!

by alpha_dog
He always seemed suspicious.

No Signal
Suspicious, but not a rumble!

A friend tells me: In the days I sit in the evening, the mood is crazy, depressed, life is shit. There comes a text message, I read: "I fell from a horse, a fracture with a twist, while the bone was straightened, turned in all the unthinkable directions, when I was tired of my screams, gave anesthesia. I woke up and realized that life is so beautiful!!!". I sit in a stupor and think: and I have nothing to do, not so bad...

How is life? We still remember you. The Cat. by Odin. The Schröder. and Hui.

Mothers at the Children's Playground:
Are you doing loading? I also need to, I don’t lose weight... No, I can’t here, people are watching... Well, girls, can’t you get a beer right here on the bench?

C is charged:
A 11th grade student wrote a CT on 10 out of 100. What she argued about such a low score shocked me.

How could they give me such a low assessment? They have a test with mistakes, and children suffer from it!

Did you write a mistake? You can appeal.

Of course I recorded! Here you look. In the task, you need to specify which words are written together and which words are written through the defect. One option is chicken. How did they do this test if they don’t know the rules?

I don’t understand where the mistake is.

Did you not teach it in school? “No” is always written separately. It should have been written, “Chicken is not dry!”

And what do you think is “dry” and what does it have to do with chicken?

Are you joking? The dryer is such a small bubble! I say the idiots did this test!

Fuck, I counted you. In any company, I am the center of attention. When everyone gets their iPhones, Samsung and other luminae out of their pockets, it’s a bit, but when I get my Nokia 3310 out of my pockets...

XXX: I witnessed a stereotype recently.
XXX I am on the bus. There is a blonde at one stop. Such a glamorous cheese! At ten minutes she showed everyone what a good phone she has and that she can listen to music from it in her headphones)))
YYY: Is it broken?
xxx is not
XXX: Somebody called her. She looks happy to turn off the headphones from the phone, while forgetting to pull them out of her ears. For two minutes she complained about the entire bus "What a bad connection here", "These buses catch nothing" and recommended the interlocutor to pull his head out of his ass!
One of the boys who stood next to him couldn’t stand, knocked her on the shoulder and asked the entire bus: “Girl, you got it!” Take your headphones out of your ass!
XXX is the curtain. Kiso with a red face from shame jumped out at the next stop)))
yyy: Epic fail >_<

alienator: Privatbank has the widest range of online services, but they are all implemented through a universal interface.

Private Bank is crazy in its innovations. One Facebook “Like” button is worth it. In a note, for a moment. Salary has come - share with friends, bluff

>>Indications for use - diseases

Fuck the package! I could not write that in the instructions for medication. This is 100% BAD. For the medicine will write "diseases". These are guest requirements.

Good night to you =))

WOW: And you, the sweetest, sweetest, sweetest, sweetest dreams, with light elements of erotics, action, zombies, blood and ruby.

XH: O_o

to this:
NoNoNo
called a young man who is interested in the job of the IT chief and who was unable to send a resume from the site - did not understand how
NoNoNo
Known HR said
On the website of a large company posted an announcement about the reception of Sisadmin
A week later, a summary
There was an error in the code, it is impossible to place the summary
the only one - repaired the code, placed the resume and broke it back - as it was
He was accepted...

Why did Vitaly leave?
- He went to ask for an advance for the doctor, and he was told there was no money, walk away from here. Then he at the next collection of the factory, asked to read poems, about the factory. And I read:

Factory, factory, fuck you in my mouth
Directorate Fuck and Production
Go on, fucking leader.

People have not been there for a long time.

X: I want to post a Russian startup advertisement on your blog. How can this be done?
Y: Make a nickel from nitrocellulose.
Y: Burn it up.
Y: Put yourself in your ass.
Y: Place photos of the process and results on your website.
Y: And I will definitely make a reference to this spectacle. You will not see a burning spammer every year.

Qaartez: You know, I have in my lexicon the expression "A You are original!" very organically replaces "A You, batenka, idiot!"