It seems to me that if on packages of cigarettes such as "glamour" or "kiss" to write "smoking KILLS small cute cats, the effect will be stronger than from ordinary inscriptions ;)

to a screw wrapped with a pillow

I had the castle broken in the toilet when I was inside.
So I broke the lock with my eyelid.

XXX: I wonder, but who is he in the horoscope sign?
The Light, the Zodiac
Q: Which month is this?

Xentrea: Yesterday was the crown.
We sit in a couple, people are few.
We have a "sweet couple" - a boy-major and a boy-side-size.
They got the teaching, he placed them in different places in the class.
and asks the boy-major - "And why don't you write anything, how will you answer on the next couple?"
The boy enters.
In a minute he gives out - "And I’ll take Max!
The Mahatma pause.
Prev "So straight and take"

We cried, we cried and we broke a couple :)))

She shaved her one-year-old daughter’s nails and accidentally slightly cut her skin on her finger. The morning was quite tiny, but the blood, for some reason, did not stop and everything coated and coated. Since it is strange to call an ambulance because of a cut finger, I decided to call my uncle (he is a biochemist) and ask for advice. Since he lives in a neighboring house, he even offered to come in person and help in this terrible trouble.
In this way, I witnessed a stunning picture: a biochemist, a candidate of biological sciences, self-sacrificed to help, began to whisper the wound!
P.S And the funniest thing is that it helped! :)

I have a morning today!
At first I slept a little, then it turned out that the menstrual periods began. Then, finally, she prepared breakfast and carried it into the room on the nose. And it was necessary to put him by the table, turning at the same time on the floor of the open (!) clamps! The tea has shed! And the butter, of course, fell oil down! The condensed painting flows from the wallpaper and the closet, I go to the bathroom for a cloth - and a batch! The lights burned out!! What a coincidence!! While I was looking for the cloth, the dog slipped his mouth into the cloth of the cloth while I washed it, the cat sat on the edge of the cloth and with a satisfied mouth grabbed her!!! He can’t eat milk and sweets. I am protecting! I am also late! In short, in conclusion, already on the way to work in the bus there was a fight between the driver and the passenger... Today is not Monday?! to

Shade> What insects eat cockroaches? To settle a pair or another and no one cockroach in a week.
fenix> And then you ask the question - which insects eat the insects that eat the cockroaches???? to

I quit smoking, now I don't know how much to sit in the toilet

I recently got a taxi. The taxi driver talked, began "for life".
He: And in general, a good job, his own master.
I: here on the left.

The man who put the status: "Playing with vodka drinks is ohueenno!"
After an hour and a half wrote in the chat: "chso hmyd ep ipso hnoplo"

from Rambler news, comment:

Template for the first and other zombies channels news:
1) Putin met with some foreign mydak. We discussed a very important issue. Which and why, the stick knows.
2) Some shells shoot at other shells. Xylle they want – I don’t understand. But it is all bad and it cannot be so at all.
3) Some hyi from the government is reporting to Medvedev. Medvedev gives him an important task. He promises to take the matter under control.
Putin is also a man. He went fishing, walked through the forest, greeted the boy by hand.
5) On the Pi3dozalypiHsk Peninsula something ebnulo. 84 people were killed and 153 left homeless. Putin said he will do his best.
Modernization and nanotechnology. Medvedev turns in his hands nanoxyine. Russian science is the best in the world.
Putin has promised to raise the rate by 150% by 2028. Anyway, all of them are poxy. In five minutes, you will forget everything.
A cute bird, like a bear in the zoo. To remove the negative.

SkiAngel Nowhere (21:24) :
In short, remember the principles of successful anal sex: good lubrication, good fixation and good sound insulation

_Eko_ (22:24:18 8/02/2011)
Maybe you look at the banner, maybe you make something or rework you do well photoshop?

Purity (22:25:16 8/02/2011)
It’s not bad, let’s.

_Eko_ (22:25:56 8/02/2011)
Give me a psd

Purity (22:26:04 8/02/2011)
For what?

Every year, I understand less and less why I need a computer without the Internet.

The clock shift is cancelled!
YYY: O how
What about Windy?
XXX: For windows update must be. Just don’t forget to remove it :)
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
What do I do with the lamps?
xxx: Dick, blank: "Repair clocks in Windows. and fast. It is cheap" :D

xxx: And the gnomes, who drag money on one coin from a savings account to a card (through Sberbank-online) for the second day who can complain?? to

Medvedev cancelled the switch to winter time
YYY: The transition to the summer has not been canceled by accident? Or we’ll just go over to the summer.
In a few years, we will be in the past.

Rambler wrote:
A 73-year-old junior teacher was sentenced to 10 years for selling heroin.
Guess the country by title!

Imagine what it will be like to someone who falls into who age, say, at 20, and gets out of it at 80. What will he think first?
VU: "bla, the universe has fallen asleep!"

accountant (girl): Denis Sergeevich, send me again the standard Excel form of monthly report please
Finder: OK, catch

In a month

Accountant: Denis Sergeevich, please send the monthly report form in Excel
Finder: as I sent already, catch

In a month

Accountant: Denis Sergeevich, I have the standard Excel report forms finished, please send another one.
Finisher: Is it over? Are you removing them?
Accountant: Not that you, I fill them out and send them to you every month!