Caring in an emo environment is a complex and confusing ritual.
Its main task is to find out the sex of the partner as unobtrusively and delicately as possible.
c) The joke
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You are lying, my dear. This is not an anecdote, but a twisted quote about the Gnomes from Terry Pratchett's books. Dwarves not only in the view of other species all equally bearded, in helmets and purely abstract somewhere there under the knots differ in gender, but also between themselves the question of gender only in marital relationships and affect, without having a social gender role.