The Atomic Cat

Basil had his right ear and cheek broken and it seemed like he was smiling all the time. But Vasily never smiled because he was a harsh naval cat, and his scars were caught in battles with rats. To remove the accusations of catophobia, I dedicate a separate story to Vasily.

Vasily lived on a heavy nuclear submarine cruiser of strategic purpose TC-13 and was there at full satisfaction. Even someone, in a joke, inscribed it with a pencil in the TCR (typical ship schedule). Basil's service on the cruiser was to catch rats.

The rats did not travel on the submarines that went to the sea, but it was worth the boat to stand at the shore for years - and here they are: here as here. And the TC-13 at that time was not in the sea of two years probably, or three, and, therefore, the rats already loved it and settled in two prades: one in the missile compartments, the other in the residential. You may ask, of course, how the rats got on board the submarine, and I will tell you, because I have seen it with my own eyes, and since then it seems to me that if the rats were the size of a dog, at least, all our relatively peaceful existence on this planet would have long since ended. The rat runs along a long square end, which hangs and whispers, and the bullet glides into the superstructure. From there, it climbs on a two-section staircase to the border hole and descends down the vertical staircase. Also, by the way, they went out for a walk, well or there to run to the store, I don't know - I didn't ask. How they learned that the ship did not go to the sea is a mystery. I have always looked at the orders of the higher instances with interest, but nowhere in the mail I have not noticed the address of "Krysinemu Kralju, zat Nerpičja, pier 3", although it was written with special ink.

We took the TC-13 for a while so that its crew would go on full-fledged vacation (two months for non-navigators), and our little one at this time was taken to the sea to break the ice, I won't say which crew. We came in a friendly camp with things on the ship, minutes to ten signed the acts and began to drink (shortly) to get acquainted with the match. I sit in the center and knock the buttons of my piano as I feel someone’s gaze on me. I turn around, there is a black-and-white monster sitting on the comings square with a broken ear and smiling at me.
You are who? I ask him.
by Meu! It says it.
I don’t know if it’s a dog, what’s your name?
"Vasily is his name," replies the commander of TC-13, coming out with us from the assault room, where they drank and recounted the cards. “Sasha (it’s already our commander), you don’t offend me here! He is worthy of rats and generally smarter than our mine!
"Smarter than a miner is not an indicator, of course, but that you, Volodya, we do not offend children, animals and miners.
“Sasha, I won’t take the ship back if anything! You know me! Give up Vasily!

Basil moves and they leave.
This is the first time I have encountered such a phenomenon as a rat on a submarine. Surprisingly clever creatures, I will report to you. They entered and stole everything they could eat. For example, I was once stolen a sausage from a bench with a iron lid. I come into the cabin, and on the floor lies a bank, which stood in a closed secretary, the lid is open and an orphan is lying. There were two!!! to
and diary! I scream to the neighbor’s cabin, go here!
The smoke rises.
Why did you, I say, steal the sauce from me?
Dima looks at the bank.
Eddy, look at me. Am I like a man who steals one sausage if he can steal two?
Logically of course.

We put rats on them everywhere, and explained to Vasily that he would not touch a snare in them. not touched. The rats were caught, but nevertheless did not be exterminated, so Vasily was scheduled with whom he is sleeping in the cabin today.

every day. I emphasize, every day, at eight o’clock in the evening, when the guard was gathering at the central post for work, Vasily came with a suffocated rat, threw it to the seat of the ship’s guard, listened to praise in his address and proudly left.
The Abby! We shouted to him first, “Take your rat!”! to

But then they realized that Vasily was an aristocrat by nature and is a rat whispered. He just killed them. Therefore, the upper watchman, coming to start at eight o’clock in the evening, always came with a bag. He got machine guns, ammunition and a rat. As he got onto the rocket deck, he waved a mouse over his head and, when the chicks flew, he threw it into the air. Then for five minutes he watched the infernal picture of the rat breaking into pieces, wiped out splashes of blood from his face and went to guard the boat. By the way, you know, it seems to me that if the northern bars throw a person in the air, they will eat him, even with buttons.

A couple of times we tried to endure Vasily but the will to walk. He looked at the universe and cried out to us:
What are you doing, fascists! Get back on board immediately!! Am I a boat cat or where?! to
We took it to the pierce and let it go:
- Basil, go there for a cat, find a cat, take a bride!
But Vasily fled with the bullet to the shirt and sat there waiting for someone to drop him down. Aristocrats, apparently, not only do not eat rats, but also do not crawl on the vertical stairs.
Then we were gathered at sea. Well, you are our heroes, cha, the command said to us, do not weak to you on this aged cruiser in the sea for a week or two, to please, so to speak, old lady, for the last time. Of course not weak. What to do with Vasily was decided at the general officer meeting. Vasily sat at the table and licked the eggs listening attentively.
What will we do with Vasa? In the sea to take it terrible, suddenly will not stand, maybe home who will take it for a while?
He is afraid to get out of the boat.
So, let’s give it back for 200 seconds.
And let us.

They took Basil to the neighboring boat and went to the sea. We return, and on the fair we are welcomed by the native crew of TC-13, markedly rested, burned (it is good to be a non-linear crew) and joyfully mashed us with feathers.
A friendly crowd falls on board before the trap is placed.
Where is Vasily? - the first thing asks the commander of the TC-13 at our.
He was given two hundred seconds, so that he could not risk.
Sasha, I have warned you! Either bring me Basil here, or we go further to the barracks to drink vodka and corrupt ourselves!! to
“Eduard, go away right? And then this coastal marasmatic will eat me all the baldness!
Why not run away? After two weeks in the sea, it looks like wood. I go to two hundred second.
To whom are you, Tatsuya? Interested in the top two hundred second.
to Grandfather Phom. Tell your coastal olives there, let them start to mess up - the sea wolf on board is rising!
Central and upper. A sailor came to you. It looks serious.
Here is that and that. I go down and on the last staircase I caaaak will get stuck in someone’s ass with his nails and caaaak let’s climb my new alpak to my chest!!! Basil is understandable. Everything is dirty, all of it is dirty.
What a wasteland!! - screams to me Vasily, looking straight in the face, - how daring to crush the city shipwreck!!! The animals!! You are animals!! to
“Let me,” I replied, glorifying him, “Vasily, but we have done our best for your good, your health, so to speak, has been preserved. The boat is the same and the people here are good, cats do not eat!! to
Get stuck on!! - continues to scream at me Vasily, - shutdown of the greenery!! to
“Well,” said the two-hundred-second duty officer, “he was sitting here for two weeks under a loophole. I did not eat much and looked up. They brought him to the ground once, he ran all the pier and then sat down on the helicopter site in the sea to watch. He was caught back on board. And the character!
I carry Vasily back behind the sinus, and there the commander is already waiting for him, anxious (one of us sleeps in the chair, and this runs down the central)
Have I brought?
“Well,” I said, “this is he!
And I stand watching the picture, like the captain of the first rank, kissing Vasily everywhere in a row and rejoicing, just like a small child.
So I’m not that I don’t like cats, but I’m used to loving specific personalities rather than megatons of photos in my tape. Basil, for example, I loved it.