There is a common misconception that euphoria, joy, gratitude or other strong emotion arises when certain conditions of a person's life are satisfied.
In fact, this is not root correct.
Any emotion is the essence of a reaction to changes in current conditions:
It was warm, it was cold – irritation.
It was hungry and filled with happiness.
and so on. Neither feelings of heat/cold, nor satiety/hunger, nor any other, will cause any emotions if they are stable and unchanged.
Love as a feeling does not exist. It is only a set of strong regular emotions that arise in connection with the associative perception of a particular person.
By the way, there is no universal set of such feelings for any person that could be determined as love. Everyone is unique. It unites a similar group of emotions and gives the opportunity to designate a separate term only the fact of their occurrence in connection with a particular person and the obsessiveness of these emotions over time.
It is believed that the higher such obsession, the stronger the so-called. The love.
Simply put, love is emotions that arise in connection with the hopes of an individual to change some of their own established conditions of life for the better.
From here it is easy to understand and possible reasons for the cessation of "love".
In fact, there are only two:
disappointment (the difficult path)
Satisfaction is the easiest way.
In other words, in order to be loved, you need either:
- to convince in the hopelessness of the feeding hopes (and not so much consciously as subconsciously, because almost nobody is able to clearly determine that personal set of expectations, which causes him a feeling of love);
- either to meet expectations and wait for that short moment, when this will cause a natural outbreak of the corresponding emotions, and the object of past love will lose relevance.
Well, the opposite situation: if you want to keep the attention of the object on yourself as the source of his love, you need either:
- not satisfy the expected expectations, while leaving hope for success in the future (easy path);
- or to evolve with him / her, each time concentrating in yourself precisely those qualities that are needed by the partner for further development.