bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №56264
 10.11.2011
What would you feel if you had your head cut off?
Tagged: easy boredom

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №56263
 10.11.2011
A commentary on the puzzle of 1000 fragments from the painting of D. Pollock:

To the grey, the child will gather!

[ + 69 - ] Comment quote №56262
 10.11.2011
Lucicchio: By the way, I’m quite tolerant of pimples.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №56261
 10.11.2011
I'm driving today, without papers, without permits, and it's dark on the street.
xxx: I see, the Gaiishnik stands in the distance, well, the shape is so well illuminated. I slowed down, attached the belt, opened the window, and there was a bumblebee of some bearded standing in the form of a menta.
xxx: Well, and the hell pulled me out to say to him, "huli scares a liar?"...
xxx: Today I go to GAI to pay a fine and take the car...

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №56260
 10.11.2011
XXX is:
There was a problem - received a paper for obtaining a visa in the United States where it is necessary to provide a certificate that you are not a member of the following organizations:
"Al Qaeda"
"Ansar al-Islam"
"The Taliban Movement"
"The Islamic Jihad"
"Brigades of the Martyrs of Al-Aqsa"
"Hamas"
"Hezbollah"
Forget where, fucking, the offices of these organizations in Moscow!

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №56259
 10.11.2011
I have two daughters at work, the direct daughter of the captain obvious.
The dialogue:
Something is very dark.
So nothing is seen.
You can’t see because it’s dark, and when it’s dark, you can’t see everything.
We need to order the lights and it will be brighter.
When it is brighter, it will not be so dark.
It’s very dark now, hopefully lighting it all.

Silently officed

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №56258
 10.11.2011
xxx: I yesterday in the home phone calls and say, - need evidence of water O_o
Is there an O5 waterfall?

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №56257
 10.11.2011
In the sociology. Prep (P) to students (C):

Q: Do you need examples here?
C is yes!! to
Q: Do you know the term "underdeveloped"?? to
Pause *
Q: Is it about us or is it an example?

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №56256
 10.11.2011
Raskolnikov: 170 years ago, no one could have thought that the grandmother would survive and open branches across the country.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №56255
 10.11.2011
Grandmother in the department
I want to order a priest home, the internet has started to work badly
and??? to
A young man who last cleaned the internet said there was a mistake in the holy couple and crossed it.

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №56254
 10.11.2011
XXX is
Fuck... I want to sleep... the eyes cling, I sit down on the half-eye...) the boss passes by behind my back and says, "Good morning, well, get up, you are waiting for a beautiful day, so gentle practically loving? with a stolen voice. I panicked on a chair, mouthed with bricks, eyes on the monitor, hands on the key. And he says "Do not hope! I’m not you, I’m with my wife on the phone!" and she goes away...

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №56253
 10.11.2011
Buy a coupon!
xxx: get a half)

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №56252
 10.11.2011
My acquaintance with Sisadmin told me this story:
He came to me one evening, late after work, ate, sat in the inette, then we had sex with him.. in the morning mom knocks on the door, and he lies without cowards, I tell him:
Dress a coward or cover yourself with a blanket, or my mother can’t come to me.
What he says in his dream:
Strange, I didn’t change my password on the domain.

c) Finch

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №56251
 10.11.2011
Kirli: Fuck, how to reprogram a cat?
+DeaTh+: Is it a Nafig?
Kirli: I told you that we moved.And the cat has a habit-when you let him into the house, he carries everything on his way, flies into the kitchen..And in the new apartment the kitchen is on the other side.I am already sorry to watch how he every time with a fresh дури enters the wall >.<

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56250
 10.11.2011
HHH: Sory, I have a battle with Winegret here just happened...
I ate him, and he vengeantly forced me to read all the air refreshers.
Thoughts: 1:1
XXX: 3:1... in his favour (((

[ + 69 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56249
 10.11.2011
The Prehistory:
Two weeks ago with his sister (15 years old) watched the "Paranormal phenomenon". The movie probably impressed her. A couple of days ago, someone in the door of the fence broke the eye, and the next day - broke the pen. It was everywhere, so I wasn’t very surprised (unfortunately, I couldn’t catch it), but my sister was scared.
Tonight I left my computer on, I went to work myself, I had to wait for one person. Waiting for 15 minutes, it became boring, decided from the working computer to go to his, with the help of Teamviewer. Usually, when I leave the house, the monitor on the home cut, and here, apparently, forgot. Well, I lay in my computer, went to the Opera, contacted, liked the photos of my friends, then went to see the photos that are on my screw... And there is a phone call from my sister. Such a dialogue:
I am ALO.
She (with a frightened voice): Hey... and where are you?
I am in the office, waiting for the client. and what?
...And then it comes to me, I begin to roast wildly and reassure my sister, say, it is I got into my computer and open various windows.
She also led her friend to the exit, left in the apartment alone. She turned off the light in the hallway, but her gaze accidentally stumbled upon the reflection in the mirror in which she saw my monitor. And on the monitor, the mouse opens the opera itself, puts likes, lists photos...
Thank God, I didn’t even think about the music.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №56248
 10.11.2011
Can the day of the police, which falls on the full moon, be considered a day of turn in the pursuit?

[ + 68 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56247
 10.11.2011
Absolutely major crane (M) twisting keys approaches the company of nephers, namely to the most popular and ulcerative girl in the company (D).

Girl, can I meet you?
D: No is not.
M: What if you think?
D: I allow it. Think of.
Q: Can we ride a car?
(D): Hm... on the face of thoughtfulness... What are you riding on?
A is out. *Touch the keys in the direction of the new mesh 3*
D: It is cool. Their own? Did Dad buy it?
Dad bought it.
Let’s get to know your dad, right?

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №56246
 10.11.2011
She: I don’t have a boyfriend because all the boys want me just one.
Q: Do you want to fuck up?

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №56245
 10.11.2011
Bleached
Now opened a photo of the solar eclipse on Google+.
The first comments:
AAA: Wow
BBB is incredible!
Ccc: Really great shot.
DDD: Oh nice!
The quality is not very

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