bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №73967
 08.12.2012
The VKontakte Group:

What gender is the dancer/dancer in a yellow costume from the Gangnam Style clip?
They are Koreans.
xxx: thank you
zzz: O_o

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №73966
 08.12.2012
Are you Arab or Jewish?
Can I have my option?
Serge: Thank you for the reply.

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73965
 08.12.2012
Hey, they brought a note, say the son works a lot, here the keys and broke off... I wonder who is lying to whom, they lie to me or their son? Because the broken keys are w,s,a,d,ctrl,shift,space...

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №73964
 08.12.2012
Why do cats, when they are asked to open the door and you open it, stand long in the passage?
<SteiN>touch when textures are loaded

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №73963
 08.12.2012
she: za4em voobs4e brosat' kurit'?
I: the whisper said it will not stand
She is: pe4al'ka
I: sadness is, let’s say, the paper in the toilet is gone, or an asteroid is flying to the ground... but with a scream it is a catastrophe!! to

[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №73962
 08.12.2012
Nowadays, the ability to get red remains only in hypertensive people and alcoholics.

[ + 46 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73961
 08.12.2012
Theft is the opposite.
The wife has a younger sister, looking at which from the side - it is possible to assume that if you spit or suck in her direction, then she will crash to hit by a shock airwave.
She has 172 cm of body height, and the body itself weighs only 45-47 kg, and she looks like a truss.
Sometimes I call her a “podyum old hangover,” and she doesn’t get offended. He is a technical translator who works. So here. and yesterday.
Late in the evening, a call from her. And immediately, by the fact that she can - without preface:
- I was attacked... Three devils jumped out right on the turn into our street... Billat, the jacket was broken...
A healthy life?
They didn’t know that I was a judo.
Are they then alive? I don’t ask about their health.
- You are funny, and as a result - two are now lying in a frozen pit, and one - escaped, fell!
Are those who are lying alive?
Where are they going? They lie down, crawl, like a crap... Well, what do I do? Can I call the police?
It is stupid! Call an ambulance from the automate - if you find one - and get your feet away from there!
and silence...
- Listen, I am ashamed, of course, but the pockets of the lying - I cleaned up!... compensation, so to speak. For a sudden scare and a broken jacket. Do not worry. These goops had only 593 rubles (they would always live like that).
I am silent...
“Don’t blame, even on the phone – I see your dissatisfied face.
I am them!! All the whole!! It is 93 rubles! I left in the metro.

PS: well... what to say – BIGGODY, type – from the victim – hello to the thief!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №73960
 08.12.2012
The Jew to the thieves: "I have nothing against being robbed, but I have no money with me. “Give me, I will owe you.”

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №73959
 08.12.2012

A young man in an audiobook store.
Show me the classic.
Which one?
Aria, Metalica and Manovars.
Do you want something heavy?
What is there?
Well, judging by you – Mozart, Bach, Beethoven...

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №73958
 08.12.2012
xx: AV Kaspersky complains about infecting a file with a virus that does not exist)
xx is fucking
3opre: "I think you’re not sick of me"

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73957
 08.12.2012
Subject: Help for IPT, stupid questions for specialists.
Question: stood 7maximum v 7601..WITH FIGHTING ANTI-VIRUS something caught up..overloaded from the disk..and the label lost...now the black screen...give the way..plz...
Answer No. 1: The cheese machined the wheelchair, went out the window to a date.
P.s And now slowly by point and without rush, explain your problem as elaborately as possible, in familiar words.
Answer No. 2: The battery is rotating, but there is no gas.
Question No. 3: What is it special from birth?
What I don’t understand, Chel directly writes:
>Stalled 7maximum v 7601.
Windows 7 Ultimate version 7601
>While fighting with antivirus something stuck..overloaded from the disk..
As a result of an infection or an antivirus conflict, reinstalled the system from the disk.
>a label lost...now black screens
I did not find the activation key, the trial mode ended, the screw is not activated, the desktop is black.
> give me the way.
Asks for a link to activate the screw or crack.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №73956
 08.12.2012
The Ministry of Foreign Affairs of the Russian Federation finds it tragic that Russian officials have become victims of the “Magnitsky Law” – that is, thieves, scammers and murderers – are “victims”?

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №73955
 08.12.2012
Conversation with a programmer:
You have grey hair.
This is a beaten pixel.

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73954
 08.12.2012
comment to news: "Officials want to transfer to domestic cars"
The majority of officials should not be transferred to domestic cars, but to domestic prisons.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73953
 08.12.2012
There was a dialogue between two employees.

Yes, big titles are big problems.
All problems are worse than titles.
No titles, no problems
Why Men Have No Problems
Because there are no titles.
NN : :D
But the thick men already have problems.
at least because men should not have titles and they have

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №73952
 08.12.2012
My boyfriend is going to the sea. He left for Brazil for five months, and now he has to come back. I have prepared a delicious dinner, cleaned up the house, waiting for him to call and tell him that he is already at the airport to meet me.
At home it was cold, so she made herself a warm coat, slept under her sweater, put on her stomach, and fell asleep.

I woke up from the cry of the faithful (I have already arrived). He talked to someone on the phone.
– Throw it, and Polka didn’t tell me that she was pregnant! – Fuck, how can’t you understand if she has a huge bubble!

I cried for a long time, clapping myself on the hot spot)))


[ + 37 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73951
 08.12.2012
If we remember that "de" is "removal, denial", it will be clear why the patch of thin models was called - de-phile.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №73950
 08.12.2012
Blocking of videos on YouTube
xxx: It turns out that if you post a piece of YouTube video on the NTV channel, this original video will be blocked?
Yyy: Does anyone know what to post on YouTube to block NTV?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №73949
 07.12.2012
Young man, don’t keep me foolish! I have been using the internet for 6 years!
Open the browser.
What is BRAZER?! to

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №73948
 07.12.2012
"The Economist"

Never save on girls!To save SMS, I wrote without gaps!Gasted 3 for explanations and 2 for apologies!!! to

Never ever! Do not save on your nerves - choose smart partners! Lord, stop smashing the slugs here, complaining about your TP - so you stand by them!

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