bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №72046
 24.10.2012
MEPs are concerned:

Russian Foreign Ministry concerned about human rights in the United States
Russian Foreign Ministry concerned about the situation with the protection of children's rights in the United States
Russian Foreign Ministry worried about police arbitration in the US

Something is dead in the Kremlin.

xxx: There seems to be someone resurrected and asked to report on the results of the four past five years!

[ + 13 - ] Comment quote №72045
 24.10.2012
I am a man, I want and I will decide everything!


[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №72044
 24.10.2012
A familiar in one eye stands status:
Dear Husbands!! If with the years you have lived together, you stop noticing the beauty and beauty of your wife... don’t forget that other men with vision are OK!!! to

I understand correctly what she meant by this: “No, I will not do anything with myself to improve my husband’s attitude towards me. I would rather give it to someone who has less requests!"
? to? to

Didn’t you fucking fuck at the time?

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №72043
 24.10.2012
No coaches in the halls. There are no coaches.
YYY: And I have a coach. At the weight of 65 stang pushed out in 120 kg. The worker was 80.
zzz: I once pushed a 220 kg bar. It was not bad.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №72042
 24.10.2012
2011-03-14 15:15
DrBerD (20.53): Every nine months, Snow White’s guard increased by one dwarf.
2012-10-23 22:06
DrBerD: Thus 300 Spartans were born.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №72041
 24.10.2012
Discuss the need for Full HD displays on smartphones.

xxx: They are more focused on lovers of "piskomerry", who have recently divorced...

YYY: Spy killings sent humans into space.
Progress always had two engines: laziness and murder.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №72040
 24.10.2012
From contact :
xxx: Username, how to increase memory
Remember it will increase!

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №72039
 24.10.2012
I mean on the bus.
A half-hopper and a half-hopper are sitting behind.
Ohga
-Huy knows, on pay or on the budget.. but dressed well.. and talking without a mat.. the guy all such a ham.. and she is not better.. there is a dispute about the fact that women can't nihuya.. well the guy aesthetic started) and says: call me great women!
- now
It is Remark.
He said, “But apart from her!
...
I did not listen further.
I laughed so much that they stopped... I cried crazy. Everyone looked at me like a fool, but the fool here is not me.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №72038
 24.10.2012
the_prettiest_dalek: Here we were told an instructive story about human nature. Previously, there were not two orphan circles at work, but dohuya. But the abundance made people weak and the cups stopped washing. Then the senior of the shift, Kirill, gathered up all the dishes and threw out the knot. :D

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №72037
 24.10.2012
In other words, Gary is a joke.
We had to pay all sorts of debts to the department, well, and we think, because we were four and we had more debts for all of us.
We need someone to perform in the role of a kamikaze, go to the department and see what lectures there are, to whom we can pay debts, but so that there are no other lectures, which we also owe something, but not yet able to give.
Here Gerich decided to be this kamikaze.
He knocks, hides behind the door, puzzles there for a short time, and then leaves the department.
We ask who is there.
And he looks at us with sad eyes and says: "Full House. Only flash royals are missing".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №72036
 24.10.2012
XXX: I'm on the tablet to perfect the skills of sudoku and domino :)
And recently the toy jumped - there you need to guess the names of logos (a little changed). A great toy.
YYY: the main thing is that there is no logo of any Manchurian-Pyeongchang plant of bio-toilets.
XXX: Is it okay?
YYY: *ROFL* and you are nothing, promising

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №72035
 24.10.2012
- I have the first shit okay, the second coma, and then everything is okay again.
You just have iteration numbers starting from zero.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №72034
 24.10.2012
News about the return of the RPC building in Nizhny Novgorod, where since the beginning of the 20th century there was a conservatory.

The comment was delighted: "Well... am I pop baian?"

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №72033
 24.10.2012
Kukalyakin: Listen, let me know. Here are those people who all night drink Yaga and wort under the windows in the style of "Hear the fucking fucking!", who fight with the ugly voices of wort "Taaaan! Those are all people, they never get up. Where are they all working? Are they not at work tomorrow?! to
They are freelancers.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №72032
 24.10.2012
I went to one firm for business, while there and here, in general, the employee had to print papers for me. And then you can see something happened to the printer, it doesn’t print, even if you’re shaken. Calls, apparently Sisadmin or somebody else, and asks to just approach, without clarifying the problem.
After a couple of minutes comes... no, a boy is crushed, looking like a kilo 35 with a small, a meter tall in a jump, but with a solid beard and in a sweater with deer. He throws around the cabinet with red eyes, understands who called him, pronounces an absolutely extraterrestrial insult in an incomprehensible language and flies out of the cabinet by loudly knocking the door.
After a hundredth of a second, the door opens again. This boy appears, almost on weight, then the hand that holds the boy behind the collar of the sweater, and then after this appears the equally evil and red-eyed mistress of the hand in no less fairy sweater, but with trees.
In a calm tone, not letting the boy go, he finds out what happened, brings the boy to the printer and metallically says to him: "Do. Now.", the one presses something, a girl with a boy in her hand checks her working capacity, at the same time interested in the ladies in the office how things are going, says goodbye and takes with her the bearded body hanging in her hand.
But the work goes efficiently and without delays, yes =)

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №72031
 24.10.2012
I sit with my wife on the couch. She cries, I crawl in her noise.
I open the sapphire, I think, I will play.
My wife says, “A... it’s a game of bad luck, I’m not lucky in it.
What sort of luck am I? This is a logical game.)
I begin to explain. We are together...)))

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №72030
 24.10.2012
From the Auto Forum:

And I get the grandmothers, who in the winter from the church strike across the road, carapaches through a bunch of snow on the separation strip and slide from it under the wheels.
I always remember how I once played in GTA2, there to survive had to go to church.
And they seem to stay going to church, and after it they are not afraid of anything.

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №72029
 24.10.2012
HH: Pay attention to me!
2 years, enough is enough
Q: What is 2 years?
I pay attention
HGH: For me?
This is how to talk to you without matte.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №72028
 24.10.2012
We invited a girlfriend to our wedding, more than a hundred guests were planned:
You know, I’m busy this day. Can you postpone it for another day?

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №72027
 24.10.2012
I was born in Sakhalin.But in my childhood, I went to Vladivostok.I went to school in Novosibirsk, and I went to law in Peter.I entered Berlin, successfully defended my bachelor's degree, I was offered to finish a master's degree in New York.I graduated, I got a job in an oil company.They are sent to Sakhalin.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna