bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 43 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68886
 23.08.2012
“Everything is good where we are not.”

Someone from familiar ecologists (I cannot unambiguously confirm the authority for years) told how he walked a Japanese colleague through the forests of the Far East in a small company of compatriots.

And as a Japanese spoke, as a Russian, rested, as a Russian and even drank, as a Russian... in the city. Because he was such a "virtual" specialist on ecology of Russia. Then he was taken out to nature. And he kept! He kept when cars and tents were placed in the forest on the bank of the river, when wood was crushed and a fire was lit, when a freshening was obtained and a shale was made of it.

He stayed until someone told him that the country, of course, was more civilized, but it was not bad too. Then I explained what a donation is. And then all the choir confirmed that the dacha has everybody.

From this moment, the poor man was transported to the slopes until his flight to his hometown of Tokyo... only he repeated:

God, I had a weekend with millionaires!

[ + 58 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68885
 23.08.2012
The closer the morning, the more comfortable the pillow.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №68884
 23.08.2012
From the website of the Rostov dolphinarium, about the rules of swimming with dolphins:
Pregnant women and children under 10 years of age (strictly) are not allowed to swim. Also not allowed drunk (better after, we will support) HD
This is the service :))))))))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №68883
 23.08.2012
If I knew I would take a loan, I would have written a box in my passport.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №68882
 23.08.2012
A father of 82 children, left to plant a forest and build a city.

Harem, the crafted oasis and the new capital of the Caliphate, I guessed?

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №68881
 23.08.2012
The colleague:
- I was a thin, scary child in my childhood... All my relatives said: “Nothing, nothing, beautiful swanks grow out of such ugly cockroaches!” and I took, and deceived everyone – I grew up with a thick, ugly cockroach.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №68880
 23.08.2012
Why can my saints row 3 hang when I load?
The game recognizes you and refuses to start.
I recognized you as a Petrosyan and refused to laugh.

[ + 34 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68879
 23.08.2012
My son started physics lessons at school.
I decided to check what the children are teaching today.
I ask :
How is the smallest indivisible particle called"?
It is "Pixel!"

[ + 39 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68878
 23.08.2012
Kali is the Indian goddess of death, destruction, fear and horror. He had a third eye in his forehead.
YYY: O_O_O

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №68877
 23.08.2012
The nephew. 4.5 years.
“Mom, you never told me about this car. What is it?
It is an incassor machine. Special uncles ride into banks and supermarkets, take money away.
With horror what? With all?

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №68876
 23.08.2012
What do you pay attention to when you first meet a guy?
Irishka xxx: For the appearance, and correspondingly to seeing a guy!
Vicky xxh: the painting! This is the most important thing in a man. PS: Ira learns Russian language

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №68875
 23.08.2012
SMS from a friend:
Hi Zhenya, if you don’t call Natasha right now, you’ll break up with her. Happy Birthday!

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68874
 23.08.2012
There is a genius in every human being, but my one is in a coma.

[ + 16 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68873
 22.08.2012
My cat can be shown in the circus. She virtuously hangs in the jump and cracks standing. On the back legs.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №68872
 22.08.2012
I read about the most beautiful Brazilians. In the photo - slim (sometimes thin) heavily burned girls. One of the comments: "coated acne - do you like it? Then you are here!) )"

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №68871
 22.08.2012
Karakal (14:12): When I get married, somebody will have to take into account that I have a big mocked fighting cat. You can get a slight blow to the psyche: you open your eyes in the morning, and you are looked at by a big sad mouth and confidently so whisper.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №68870
 22.08.2012
Grandfather is very funny, he doesn’t understand anything in English, but all the time tarotory in Spanish;) I always say to him in response: "CORRIDA!!!". is lost

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №68869
 22.08.2012
I was at night shift work. I drank tea from someone else’s cup.

WOW: Hey, this is my circle!
“Don’t worry, I’ll wash it.
I fucked your girlfriend, but don’t be afraid, I washed her.

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №68868
 22.08.2012
-I stand at the post office, I look at a postman girl, she has two kinds of dairy plants, and she is probably about 30.
The shameless! Take a picture, be a man.
Ah...
A few minutes later
- The sound is turned off and there is no flash... blue

xxx: guy, it's still a shit... I went here a week ago in the subway, came such a super-stylish girl in an elegant but short black dress, which barely covered her charm from behind... didn't hold up... well, in the rest, everything was like you, except that her boyfriend was with her... well, though the photo went.)

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №68867
 22.08.2012
I went to the toilet, did all my things, I stood, my hands, two glamorous chips were rolling: "Young man, look, this is a women's toilet, go where you shouldn't... " and so on. I stand, listen, shrink, soon I can't stand, knock the door into the second part of the toilet: "Once you're so smart and visible, go and urinate in the pissuar; I'm pointing my hand and I'm away...

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