There is a three-year-old cat in the house and a new cat has recently been adopted. So this little thing so got the older one that he now sleeps on the microwave, which, in turn, stands on a two-meter refrigerator))

Picked up:
I add :

>> It seems that all doctors of gynecologists in training have a special subject, which is taught:
1st All the illnesses from the fact that the woman did not give birth.
2nd And what you want, the woman has already given birth.

> This is a common course, both an oculist and a neurologist told me about it.

I wonder, and the men's oculists-neurologists what do they say? "It’s all from what didn’t serve"?

The case was in 2010. He studied at the last class at the school. In one building with us there was another shell, respectively, the dining room was one for all. Because of the wild queues of the announcing students, we and our fellow students preferred to go to the store, which was not far from us.

Once again we went there and bought everything the student soul wanted, we waited for one of the comrades to finally decide on the purchases. We see such a picture. Behind this guy is a man holding in his hand 500 rubles with one note. One group turns to him, looks closely in his eyes, takes this money straight from his hands, pays it at the box office, takes the deposit and leaves. To say that we were confused is to say nothing.

We approach him and ask him what it was. As we go back to school, he tells us everything in order. He is standing and feels as if someone’s hand slips into his back pocket, where it was just 500 rubles with one note. He turns around and sees the money in his hand. At first, I thought to run him in the cheek, but I thought it wasn’t worth it.

We are already approaching the slate, the couple is about to begin, well, a group member at the end of the story decided to show us what pocket the perpetrator was in.

He puts his hand in the jeans and makes you think. He gets his money from there.

From this focus, everyone’s look is even more shaken than from the moment that happened 5 minutes ago.

We go back to the store with the whole crowd, hoping to find this uncle there, to return to him the accidentally stolen and explain the situation, but unfortunately, he was no longer there.

I imagined how this story looked from the man’s side and was terrified. In the middle of the day, in public, some teenager drops him for money, while he is paid by them and goes to his friends. The script for NTV is ready.

We got rid of a young man from school earlier. I decided to look at the antikafe. Wake up in the first half of the day. There is no one in the antikafe except us: if you want to play on the board, if you want to compete in justdance, if you want to beat each other on the board with heroes from the Justice League. Well, of course, everything was intertwined with hugs and kisses (love, romance and all that).

And here we sit, we play, I’ve already accepted that his Aquaman is now “washing” (drop into the toilet, as I called it) with his superpower my Harley Quinn. As here under the ceiling is a strange sinking and in a couple of seconds the pipe over us breaks and our things (and part of us) is shaken by a stream of not water at all. In appearance, it was most like Venom from Spider-Man. And by smell... Antikafe was in the basement. And it was the untransmitted smell of fecal waste of all the inhabitants of the upper floors.

Romanticism was killed to the root on that day. As killed and my bag, and a leather case on the phone, from which no scarf was removed from the smell of the first-class shit.

And if you suddenly get into a similar situation, never try to fill the smell of shit with your favorite perfume, so that the amber in the subway is smaller from you. Amber is less. The perfume is no longer loved.

P.S. And the owner of the antikafe didn’t even scratch or apologize for the incident. It was not his fault, but the builders from above. Thank you for not paying for this visit.

This is a shit, in the real sense of the word, a date : (

and OK:

YYY: No, it’s not about discomfort. We (boys) are stupidly embarrassed about possible problems with erection with a new partner (and so exciting, and still all this stuff with rubber). Dumbness doesn’t seem to be hard enough, yes. And all the talk about feelings is blasphemy to hide the banal, sad and stupid truth.

And to catch up with what or shake up the one with which in the first time, is it cool what? Take Viagra until you get embarrassed. And in general, many girls understand your puzzles and don’t expect fairy sex moves from place to place. In a normal couple, sex only improves over time.

Five minutes of liquid:
Argument, if it is not possible. But those who are really harmful, 1-2 in a hundred, the rest survive.

Take the box and read: even modern contraceptives, with reduced doses of hormones, are not recommended to take after 35. Thirty and fifty, man. And menopause occurs in 45 - 50 - 55 years, who. And what do you think women now don’t fuck after 35, when libido, in general, is just at its peak?
And the second is why the manufacturers write so. The fact is that contraceptives worsen the condition of the vessels, help the occurrence of varicose veins and thrombosis. The latter is not joyful, since thrombosis leads to the formation of thrombos, with the rupture of which follows death.
Okay, when taking hormones is advised by a doctor (my case) - there are problems where you can't do without them. But when the next squid requires reception from her skin - it means that he should write on her, her health. He just uses her shell.

A large company conducted a survey.
“What are you ready to do so that you don’t fall under the cut?”

Owned
50% are willing to sleep with the boss.
40% are willing to sleep with the boss's wife.
10% are willing to sleep with the boss's dog.
0% are prepared to work better.

X: According to the legend, chess was born when a surviving fighter told on figures how the lost battle went. I wonder how he was justified.
Y: This is elementary. The ancient army consisted of heavy and light infantry (heavy and heavy). Weights are slow armored. LPs are mobile, single-hit. The weights are going to fight with the weights of the enemy - their fight will decide the outcome of the battle. The LP winds forward and exhausts the enemy's weight. In chess, judging by the speed of the figures (with the same damage), LPs are moving figures. Ferguson is a horse. The weights are pedestrian.

y: In the initial chess position, the pedestrians stand in front of them, stepping the actions of the LP. Leave the white figures as they are and change the places of the pedestrians and the figures of the blacks - the blacks will win. Apparently, the soldier said: “Our commander-in-chief chose the worst order of combat. Our cavalry was still able to break forward, crushing its own infantry. But what could I do? The archery was hindered by the back of their fighters until the defeat of the army.

Telephone call from 1C programming manager:
1C - (turns unclear) Idiots all
M – What did you say?
1C – I said good morning
M – I need to come back yesterday and remove all my corrections.
1C – I can’t take you back to the past.
C. Remove all my changes.
1C - we do not have a specific response to your changes, we do not monitor you
M - I did a lot in the nomenclature yesterday, return everything as it was
1C - I repeat - I can't get you back to yesterday
M: Then I’ll call you tomorrow.
1C is calling.

I struggle with a compass without a carpet. I complain to my husband:
I need a mouse carpet.
“Where can I get you so many mice to get enough for the carpet?”

Emm about this:

Shiva, your desire is simpler. If you put on some beginner photo model for a session, it will lead others, in 2-3 years you will have a crowd of these photo models. And where there are models, there are the millionaires who paid for their costume.

It will be a little wrong. If the "dress" for "any beginner photo model" will be dizzying good, it - attention! No one will be told where she took him, so that no one else would walk in such a superb shroud, and she, born, would not be frozen. If he isn’t fantastic, she just won’t wear it. Even if it’s just good, it’s not. Because it is not a brand. Don’t give good goddess, her, a model, will be suspected that she doesn’t keep up with fashion trends.
By the way, if our hypothetical sewing still will sew for photo models, then they, and unlikely millionaires will look at the sewing motorist as a service staff, no more.
And you, dear man, essentially offer a motorcyclist to re-qualify into a fashion designer... not interested in who will actually feed her while she is learning, progressing, gaining popularity, where she will take the start-up capital, and all that.

So it happened that my husband and I decided on extra-corporal fertilization (IVF). The reason is the male factor. And here, before another necessary manipulation in the department of gynecology, the head of the department examines my map and there is about the following dialogue:

by Зав. The eco? Why is? Ah, I see, the man’s reason, ah, ugu... Have you been fully examined already?

I - Yes

C is normal?

I – yes, it’s okay

Hmm... Well, you principally want to give birth to him, right?

I’m picking up the jaw from the table, yes.

Z - * leading the shoulder and drum already in the paper on the table * pfff, we have half the country does not grow and normally...

On the wave of cigarette beggars...

I sit at the shop and buy cigarettes.

Suits me (I) lady (B), looking 30-35 years old in a modest nork coat and running:

Give me a cigarette!

(I) After the break - now I will buy and host you.

The seller gives me my blue Winston, the lady looks at the package and gives:

I don’t smoke so much, buy it.

I couldn’t find anything to answer...

I woke up at 2 a.m. today and could not sleep for a long time. He turned, turned, eventually spit on everything, got up, drank water, turned on the computer, polished a bit of the Vkontakte tape, then played a little in Need for Speed Hot Pursuit 2 (original), and about 4: 00 went to bed, asleep with a sweet sleep...



This morning I remembered that I didn’t have Need for Speed.

The case was in the year of 95th, I lived then in a working village of 10-15k people. I was in school, first or second grade, now I can’t remember. The father was not there, and the mother from morning to evening was at work, like most parents at the time, trying to earn an extra penny. Hm... what I’m getting involved, I go to the matter. The case was this:

I came from school, the portfolio was flying in one direction, a shift in the other. And when I came home, I did not pay attention to the fact that near the entrance a woman of about my age is trembling. There were no doors in the entrances then, so, a piece of fence on rusted loopholes, more for sight, so that the snow in the entrance would not notice. Well, I didn’t have time to wash my hands and sit down at the table to throw a couple of sandwiches with sausages carefully left by my mom in the refrigerator, as I hear a cautious knock at the door. It’s so easy here. Well, I think it seemed like... After a minute more confident knock clearly three times "touch knock knock". And at the time, they liked to knock on the door or call with a "password", saying "click on the bell three times, it means yours came, open." Why all parents for their children was chosen the same "password" I don't know, apparently just a coincidence) Since I was a child not frightening / prudent, I thought something like "Well, my mom came back from work earlier or a friend came in, in the yard to call, the ball to chase." I approached the door, but what did it knock and I asked who was there. And in response a joyful child’s voice: “Hello, it’s me, open it.” Well, I think the voice of a neighbor’s classmate, it means it is. I open up and understand that Nihren is not a classmate. A healthy uncle takes his hand at the door and opens it even wider. There is another one next to him and smiles in his mouth full of golden teeth. And the Gypsies in this moment quickly run down the stairs. Even with my poor childhood mind, I realized that something very bad could happen now. “Daddy, and your mother is at home?” The smiling golden-toothed stranger asks, and his friend at this time has already pushed his back into the doorstep and has his eyes on the house. Well, I think they floated... I don’t know what sometimes moves people in extreme situations, sometimes you just wonder) I say, “Yes, dress up already, you came early” and I go straight to the big uncle. He astonished and took a step back and opened the door. At this point, I grabbed her and ran out on the street (the door we had was with a "self-blocking" lock). Apparently, such a reaction was not expected from me, because they didn't even have time to say anything, as I flew out of my entrance in socks and cowboys and ran to the neighbor. Fortunately there I had a friend who with a wild whisper pulled the phone in the hallway and I was able to call my mom to work. An hour later, I was home and chewed my favorite sandwiches with sausages. And my mom called somebody and cried, straight to a shake in her arms. Here is such a sudden “flashback” to the dream of the coming...

And people who advise the motorcyclist to sew a masterpiece suit and thus enter the society of photo models and millionaires, are generally aware that this specialty essentially means monkey after machine? A motorcyclist can’t sew things. Under current production conditions, it either processes all the edges of the parts on the machine, or performs only a certain node of the sewing product (for example, sews a lightning) - and passes on to another sewing motorist, who performs his piece of sewing action.
Swaya works as a screw in the flow and beyond one stage in the creation of the product does not go. She is not able to hide or seize the product from the idea and to the result. This is done by the prostitute. You confuse the doctor and the surgeon.

lex: No conspiracy of the Illuminati and close to the real world conspiracy of saleswomen, who so tie bags, so that they can only be broken and can)

There’s only a moment between school and retirement, and it’s...

At our entrance, Alkashi usually sits on the bench. Such, quiet, polite, calm alkashi. From our own home. Someone has grandmothers sitting, and we have alkashi.

I recently did a repair. At some point, the bathroom was replaced. An old bath, iron and heavy. I looked, I pretended – I will not get out alone. I think I will hire an alchemist.

I go to the entrance and there are three people sitting. I addressed them so joyfully:

Hi, I say guys! I am looking for someone who is full of strength, pure heart and wants to earn 500 rubles.

I answered the thinnest and seemingly the most cunning of them.

“Oh,” he said, “that’s what we are! Serena is full of strength. A pure heart. I want to earn 500 rubles.

I want to live until the time when people who burned their party tickets of the CPSU will burn the party tickets of "United Russia" in front of the TV cameras.