bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №142504
 26.06.2017
"and let’s consider breakthrough and development" you can look at the same Tesla batteries. Tesla is producing new models of cars - the battery is increasing by kilowatt-hours. Have you seen how much these cars weigh? The weight increases linearly. The Tesla 100D already weighs under 2,400 kilograms. Like a minibus. Where are the technological breakthroughs, if a car under 2.5 tons carries a passenger with an average weight of 75 kilograms? This machine for only lubrication and tires spends oil products as much as the "Niva". What happens if all the battery space is occupied? You can make such a breakthrough by throwing 2 canisters into the luggage compartment - the indicator will grow fabulously "how many kilometers can be travelled from refuelling to refuelling".

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142503
 26.06.2017
You will not hide a clever face behind a clever face.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №142502
 26.06.2017
The cat is a superhero! My son is 7 months. My mom was allowed to rest from our male company in a beauty salon and go shopping. And suddenly the baby fell in hysteria (I think it was raining), nothing could reassure him. My papal patience came to an end and I felt completely helpless. Then came the cat. The most common strip, taken three years ago in the village. He lay down next to the child, knocking him a couple of times with his head. The child grabbed into the warm wool side and calmed down. I sincerely thanked the cat! He had a solid piece of meat for dinner today.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №142501
 26.06.2017
Maybe you are an anti-Semite? Do you like Jews?
I am an internationalist! I do not love anyone!

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №142500
 26.06.2017
XXX: I’m damned by the price of gasoline. I take a taxi to work. 30 km and back.
YYY: As a child, I had a book of ancient Eastern wisdom and anecdotes. And there was a joke about a fool who replied to the news of the price of flour that he did not care - he buys ready-made bread. Why he was a fool was not explained, but at six years old I already understood.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №142499
 26.06.2017
X: Have you heard the news? In Rostelecom introduces a limit in 1TB on "unlimited" tariffs!
YYY: Well, get stuck now, before from abroad souvenirs, and now we will give the relatives on the way screws and ask to pour on them there movies, programs and photos of cats. Further tickets on the Internet?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №142498
 26.06.2017
<Natalia>Meeted on the street a full-hearted bound young man with a large fingerside under the eye and a red rose in a beautiful package. The young man walked somewhere very resolutely through the evening, holding the rose ahead.
Per someone has an interesting story.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142497
 26.06.2017
Sex is a very dangerous thing. There was no sex in the USSR. But only he had to appear, the USSR disappeared.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №142496
 26.06.2017
There was a quote: "Married, and forgot to meet her husband." This is about you, a woman whose husband threatens to break books, etc. by the text.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №142495
 26.06.2017
- I have one acquaintance - a Russian girl who married Saida - Dada. They have four children and they agreed that two of them will have a Russian name, two of them will have another.
How did they know they would have four children?

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №142494
 26.06.2017
Xxx: Not lying on the knee, but a craft handmade
Xxx: Give the Smoothie

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №142493
 26.06.2017
How many strings do you press in a lying position?
Kilograms of two hundred.
You are a nickname, but you don’t speak outwardly.
That’s the amount in a week.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №142492
 26.06.2017
The typical "survivor error" If the probability of some figi is not zero, you must always be prepared for the fact that it will happen to you. and behave accordingly
WOW: The probability that, as a result of Browne’s movement, all of your atoms will suddenly fly in one direction is not zero. Only I can’t see you behave like a man who is about to be crushed at a wall with epic force?
HH: So why then? I live in constant horror :)

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142491
 26.06.2017
Commentary on the movie "Baptist Father 2":
Here's what you can say about the classic, recounting the story that became a cure for
hundreds of other films, both American and other countries, I think is unnecessary to issue
The praise of the Holy Father, and the praise of the Holy Father, and the praise of the Holy Father, and the praise of the Holy Father.
Praise the paintings of Tiziano or the Rolls-Royce car group. 10 of 10. and charisma
It could be measured with something, such as speed or mass, it was measured at 100%.
6 in the Alps. It would be said, this guy has 1/100 alpachino, this one has 1/3 and this one has 1/100 alpachino.
td

[ + 26 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №142490
 26.06.2017
No, right fucking, do not perceive them as a service, as a sexual object - and then you need a naphiga at all? for the birth of children? So, as an incubator on your legs, you cannot be perceived, you are offended.

No need for women like you, calm down. Do you have hands? You are teenager. Try to cook and wash cowards - this is what an old mother has.
And you can also go to the pyjamas - in these days it is super fashionable.

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №142489
 25.06.2017
Today I had the most quiet exam in the universe.
You did not give up, right?
I knew I was writing, and I was calm as an udv.
XHHH: The paddle was stuck as I slide, but I didn’t have time to re-set up and walked through the forest so calmly, as if drowning.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №142488
 25.06.2017
Mom, how did I come up?
Why are you not interested?

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №142487
 25.06.2017
A: Masal Tōm, wa-haag samayah! Congratulations and celebrations!

A: Shalom, Venami

A: Taky Shalom, Rebecca

Q: And what, Rabbi, did yesterday’s Sabbath go well?

A: It is wonderful! I have spoken with a loud voice so far.

A: What has happened? Who hurt your throat?

A: Coi and Leps.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №142486
 25.06.2017
Comments under the photo with the image of tools for castration (yes-yes, and this is found on the Internet)
xxx: I have eggs from one only look into the body pulled
yyy: I hope you know that some of the tools are not for cutting but for crushing?
XX: Thank you, now I’m much easier.
Yyy: Of course, minus a gram of 100!

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №142485
 25.06.2017
Tagged with >
Why do swimmers swim?

Tagged with >
It is forbidden to swim in shoes and shoes. Dress code

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna