The Friday. On the way home, he decided to take a beer. Going into our local camp, there are a few guys-Tajik, owners and sellers in conjunction.
A friend right from the threshold: “Hello, four black goats.”
After a long pause and expression:
"Hm... Good night The goat is dark. and beer. Three banks"

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
xxx: here
Fish: here is what?
Fish: Is that all?
Fish: Is that crazy?
Fish: Sorry
XXX: Is that what happiness was?? to
The Fish: A Joke
Fish: harmless as a handicapped prostitute
Fish: I’m starting to understand why you’re so rarely writing to me.

The book seller "All the secrets of the Internet":
And you will also learn how to freeze your operating system! After freezing you will be able to visit any websites, catch any viruses, download any programs, give the computer to children - they can do anything there. After freezing your OS will be invulnerable!"

My brain...

At high gas prices, cars should be distributed free of charge.

From Habr:

"...to subscribers of mobile telephone network"

“Do you hear, kid, is there a radio telephone device for installing a radio communication session with another subscriber of a mobile radio telephone network?”

My friend gave me a very expensive ring. In the evening I roll in front of my husband, he diligently pretends that he does not notice the ring, which I could not buy. I ask :
“Why don’t you care where I got my ring from? Has anyone given it to me? A man for example?
Congratulations, my husband reacted flegmatically.
Everything is known. I go to bed and say to my husband in the back:
You don’t love me at all?
He breathes hard, turning his face:
Where did the ring come from?

Statement by VKontakte:
Do you use social networks?
Yes – 10%
No – 90%

"About childhood disappointments"

In the kindergarten we were remarkably trolled by one educator, said who first will fall asleep during a quiet hour, so I will put a film with new cartoons in my sleep and every time I woke up, I was tickly upset that some snuca again fell asleep before me.

Julia is
I yesterday when viewing the house 2 computer cut off showed the blue screen some letters and restarted and showed the house 2 again)))

Julia is
What was it?

Palyan
He left troubled.

I work in the printing. our phone is apparently written by mistake on the website of the Uzi-diagnostics center (error in one digit) we are occasionally called with the question whether we are doing all sorts of different Uzi.
The morning. The Monday.
call - "Hello, do you do vaginal uzi?"
pause.... - no we can only print everything you take.)))
One hour later, a drunken man’s voice called:
And you’re doing a freeze that’s there...
- No, we can only a vaginal uzi...and the wild rust of the whole office. There was a Dirk behind his back.

Sometimes it seems that Mrs. Fate is mocking some people. There are a lot of young girls at work. Many people get married and change their surnames. For example, there was Yaceva - became Guseva.. type grown up... But the bowl of all gave the girl with the name Tupitsyn, marrying Durkin!

Comment on the topic of the delivery of the Vasovskaya Grant to Europe

The Wind Boy
She hasn’t recovered from our tanks yet.

XXX is set. My toilet broke.
Zzzz: You fed him up.

Fuck, the soup is shit!
WOW: Well, at least I put a penny...)))

I decided to eat a sandwich at the station today. She got, turned, and here unexpectedly a cloud of dwarfs and pigeons arrives. They sat down on me and started picking up a boutique. Have you ever seen a man burn? He shakes his hands, Oret. This is how I looked. I ran away from them, waved, tried to squeeze the butter in my mouth. But in this fight they won. Fuck, I am so ashamed...

Two topics on the main page of the regional forum:

I was on the first date yesterday, still in horror from what I saw.
Number of views: 128 views: 583
anonymous 08:39, updated 10:14»

I was on my first date today. When I saw her, even the condoms in my pocket crossed!
Number of views: 880
anonymous 00:08, updated: 10:13»

Microsoft Patents a New Type of DRM Protection
You go to the TV, you want to watch a movie. He said, “Who is that behind you? The Mom? Did she pay for the movie? Out of the room! Prove that you are not a robot... okay, but this movie is only 18+, you have 18? Show me a passport... something dirty, like a fake. I’ll scan the retina, check the base... there’s no such thing, I won’t show the movie, sorry.”

I gave the DR a poker set to the head. On the day of the celebration, a set and above also played. The next day they called from the embassy and offered Israeli citizenship =)

Category "Best answers to the most covert questions of the HR department"
How you see yourself in 5 years.
I just started taking penis enlargement drugs, so in 5 years I see myself with a giant heroin.

I decided to go to bed early. And she can’t fall asleep, everything is talking something... Well, I’m so holding her hand on her hair, that is, on her shoulder. She said to me: "What are you doing to me?" And I should have cried out: "And I do not cried out. I turned off the button. I am looking for it!"