The husband yesterday says: “We need to buy condoms and Domestos.” Here is how her whole life passed before her eyes.

xxx: sent customers on Friday the 13th invoice at number 666 )) Let's see if they dare to go against the will of the dark forces and not pay it ))
Yyy: You would have given them a courier in a costume from the Cry.
HH: That is an idea!

Do you know that you are constantly being fooled? Yes, it is just you. The fact is that in the bottles with a shaving gel, a deodorant, broken cream (or whatever else you buy there) there is actually another bottle inside, much smaller! External is only for visibility. Don’t believe it – open and check!

I want to ask: do you have something for which you are willing to give your life without thinking?
For the Emperor!

xxx: I remember the caravan...My witness before the wedding told me a wonderful story about how her acquaintance jumped out of her jaw when she tried to take away a huge piece of caravan during her wedding to be most visible. And then, as soon as she was taken by the ambulance, she took her jaw "direct".

XXX: I am not stupid at all! I have a special mindset.
Your warehouse was robbed.

A whole storm of laughter and applause was earned today by a teacher who offered students who received machines to pass the exam to prove themselves.

It is unlikely that mammoths, especially mammoths, had large ears like modern elephants - such a thing terribly dissipates heat, which in the conditions of the ice age is deadly.
YYY: So that’s why the Negroes have a longer cock than, say, the inhabitants of Murmansk!

The Spring! It became warm.
There are two types of dogs on the street.
The first still walk in sweaters, and the second already in shirts and shorts

From Habr:

Dear colleague, you, of course, do not discourage, but be so kind to commit an act of killing yourself. As a way to fulfill my request, I can offer you any strong enough wall in the immediate vicinity. Also a very common solution to the problem is taking a lethal dose of poison. However, you can choose another way that is more convenient for you personally.

With respect,
The colleague.

Do you have any bad habits?
He: Yes, I’m kneeling in my nose when I kill people.

XXX is fun. The previous admin, it turns out, had a great sense of humor.
XX: The bosses in the postcards have a signature that they are gay and thirst for perversions (with variations).
YYY: Why are they not cleaned?
XXX: And they don’t see. It is a white letter. Only if you do Ctrl+A.
YYY: Yes well!
YYY: * went to set out the outlook*

On the turn to the doctor, I stand at the door, the lady tries to enter without a turn:
D: Just give it to me!
I: I just have to take it!
D: Let’s go in together...
I laughed, and the lady turned red.

Dohtur: I was recently brought a package, delivered by Roissy Mail... a metal electric vault... They were able to destroy it!!!! to

Money is evil. That accounting, in any case, is the real abode of evil.

Hello Irina?
2 to Hello. This is not Irina.
Is it possible for Irina?
2: Yes, she is not yet there, at home she is running with her...
1:... * o_o
2: oh :D, intentionally the tubes have leaked, the master is waiting!

The Advertising! You have shrunk! Go back to the TV. Destroy the videos!

How about ordering a pizza? Friday is still)
Y: thirteen
X : – O
y: we order pizza with a courier maniac) according to statistics 75% of couriers become maniacs trying to find our office)

I met a young man. by accident. I think he was interested in me...
YYY: is it sympathetic?
XXX: I like it very much.
YYY: So what are you waiting for? 😉
XXX: When he is 18

Kotik (11:08:35 13/04/2012)
We have some girls dressed today.
Kotik (11:08:44 13/04/2012)
Gathered somewhere after work
Tiger (11:09:30 13/04/2012)
HZ, but Friday the 13th. Shabby probably
Kotik (11:09:36 13/04/2012)
Oh yes of course!
Kotik (11:09:41 13/04/2012)
and ROFL