Why am I not in the polling station? I wanted to vote for myself, I haven’t won the election for a long time :(
TaroKun: Zyuganov are you?

With VIO:

I’m 16 years old, here’s a new room, and the walls are almost naked.
What else can you hang on them besides photos and posters?? to
I want something unusual.

The best answer:
Hanging up

In one movie site. Trailer of "Remember Everything" The new film. First comment from the trailer:
"Remember everything" without three suckers - money for the wind >.<"

I asked my husband - play with the child, I calmly cook the soup, I closed in the kitchen. After a while I hear —
The first, I am the second. “Change the guard!”
And so indefinitely long, intersecting with the hammered steps. Then with a loud voice:
“Pa-ap, I’m established, I could see you.”
I look - the husband sleeps safely on the couch, Valentine (3 years) in full uniform (coat, helmet, gun, sword) marching from one edge of the couch to the other, reporting to himself. I ask – what are you doing?
He answers – we and Daddy play at THE KING OF THE DIVAN!"

Advertising on the radio: "...Chevrole-Niva - a source of unlimited emotions!"
The colleague:
The Unlimited Hour?

Talk to the men of Crossword.
-- The author of the tale "Coffee".
I will call my wife. I have a humanitarian. and allo. Who wrote the "Big Brother"?
I did not write and I did not touch anything at all.

The ITAR-TASS

From the drifting ice on Sakhalin, take the attention!!!!675 people

Explain to me, is there a goldfish that fulfills three wishes for a fisherman?

JZ: I am so a failure that even when I was going to go to the army, my personal affair was lost and the army cut off from me.

A wicked genius.

Unfortunately, the current format of the forum has not justified itself. Therefore, the administration decided to dedicate our cozy monastery to a more relevant and urgent topic.

From today for the forum "Heroes and Evilmen" becomes the fan community of the series My Little Pony. For now, the matter will be limited to only graphics, and then we will bring the whole appearance of the forum, and the chat too, in the appropriate form.

At the same time, the forum is changing its name from "Heroes and Evildoers" to "Signs and Horses".

We hope for understanding and friendship.

As a student, I am genuinely entertained by mobile operators, naively believing that with 30 rubles on the phone, my funds are coming to an end. I have enough for a month!

He does not know how to bite. One time I got drunk before he screamed at the whole sorter that the water had gone away from him... Almost dropped out of the cafe (((

I bought an apartment without a mortgage. Life has lost its meaning.

I even came up with a toy: while the body is weak, you can play with a snake - from side to side, swinging your head, drinking tea and swallowing... only the cat has not yet entered the topic of O_O

I have the feeling that if I die before the cat, she will lie with me in the grave.
YYY: Oh oh why?
X: Yes, because I bled, I got it. I sit behind the compass - he lies on my knee with me. I sleep in bed with me. I go to the kitchen to eat with me. To the toilet with me. 24-hour security guards are there.
yyy: she is ß your "animal"like. If you were an animal, you would look like this :)
YYY: There is a second "you" in it.
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The KKK:
In the joint ownership of the first vice prime minister and his wife were seven cars: Jaguar, Mercedes-Benz S350, Mercedes-Benz S500, Mercedes-Benz S-Class sedan V221, limousine ZIL-41047, Ford Hymer Camp and VAZ-2101.

I don’t know if it’s a VAZ-2101.? to

In the case of a divorce, this car will be given to the wife.)

Is he at home today?
Fixflash: I’m trying to write my diploma. Apparently, the norm started, then went and cleaned 4 pairs of shoes...
Mitya: ahah pseudo useful activity

He went to check the groups in the contract, and there the group "Metro 2033" was renamed to "The Justin Bieber Fan Group". Reaction of people:
Grand Aquarity: Mo-mo-mo-my b-b-b-rat with-so-so-so-so-so-seed sta-a-al, sidi-ii-it and repeats one phrase.
Grand Aquarius (Brother): pp-pp-pido-do-gigiya

What strange sausages did you buy? It is written "without soya".
And what?
Of course, they don’t put meat in sausages. They even saved on soya.

Do not blaspheme the devil for what he tempts, but blaspheme yourself for being tempted.

A Ukrainian ship has drowned in the Black Sea. I remember, on the first day it disappeared, the news was very surprised why the crew did not send the SOS. After all, the ship was equipped with an emergency boom, which is enough to throw into the water and it will begin to give disaster signals. The Black Sea is not the Pacific Ocean and it is simply impossible to stay unheard of in it.
And here, after a few days in the mountain... the drowning were finally caught. And in one of the reports the mystery with the boom was solved.
As soon as the ship began to sink, the captain faithfully descended into the boat with the boat. And a few days sitting honestly, holding in your hands beating your legs!!! It is unknown how long this odyssey would last, but eventually, the sailors decided that the buff was broken and in a rush of anger threw him out of board. The bui immediately turned the antenna up and struck the SOS across the entire Black Sea. Within a few hours, everyone was rescued.