bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №62126
 30.03.2012
I asked? I answered:
Finally!! And before I got the girl "mode" offended for what she dreamed of...
Today she woke up and told me that I could forget about sex.) is :
I dreamed that you were hugging a guy in your dream. And he did it so gently... Scotch, how could you? No, not to give me tenderness and grace (this is the key phrase, as you did not understand?) He hugged the men. I went in the ass.
That was fucking??? O_O

Another question from the category "and why 2 + 2 = 4?" After all, she told you directly, without hints, what was the reason for the insult! The girl reacted so not because in the dream you changed her". You do not cheat her. She tolerated this – maybe she didn’t realize, maybe she thought you couldn’t do otherwise. In a dream, seeing you gentle and affectionate, I realized how much she is losing. Awakened - and next to you, the same "wood" as before. If you need her for some reason, pretend that you know how to be gentle and caring. If not, look for another, not so demanding.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №62125
 30.03.2012
A new version of Minecraft has been released, from the list of changes:

Cats can now sit on beds and boxes without allowing the player to take advantage of them.

The game is becoming more real and real.)

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №62124
 30.03.2012
News is news. "The Ministry of Emergencies of Ukraine has prepared a Catastrophe Plan for 2012"

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №62123
 30.03.2012
> Another six months of loneliness, and I will know all the porn actresses by name :((

Shit, and another six months of loneliness, and I will recognize them with my eyes closed. and (

[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №62122
 30.03.2012
23 years, there was never a girl, all the attempts to get to know in vain, on the street 'we' see if in a hurry, in the internet - the guy / husband does not allow! Where did they meet? Let all the girls die!

If you just fuck hunting - go to the club, and shoot any jerk there. Do not forget the condom.
If you want a girl, not a body.
It is risky to meet in the streets. There is a great chance to get into the mega-male, who on the 2nd date will fall under the shirt, and after getting on the mouth, will start to write here:"I have her coffee served, she’s gone!" Of course, you’re not all like that. But having snorted a couple of times on the "egg-nose", and having read similar stories here, you will start to snort from men. On the Internet, it is clear. Agree, a girl when dating is at a much greater risk than a guy.
And now it will be a very outdated council. Go to some family meetings with your parents. Just let me know in advance that you are going. 100% guarantee that there will be some quiet, modest, shy daughter of Aunt-Mashi / granddaughter of Baba-Kati, invited specifically for you. Still, in the old ways "draw" youth is something...
You have friends, right? Friends have sisters. Well, even look at the neighbor carefully - maybe you like someone else from school, but she is shy. Don't look for the "photoandell": they have exaggerated self-esteem, on the way to a new sponsor will cross you, and will not notice. Find a satellite.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №62121
 30.03.2012
Arris: The password recovery system says it does not have a user with such email. But it is not permitted to re-give up again, says - "the user with such email is already registered" *facebook spam *

[ + 32 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62120
 30.03.2012
GoodUndead: but I killed everyone when I said that the male company to take a taxi "mihailich" to the sauna "Blue Lagoon" was a bad idea %)

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №62119
 30.03.2012
From the book "Line of Grez":
"Whatever it is, it is never
He stayed on the same planet for more than nine months."

A smart guy though.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №62118
 30.03.2012
Kenya: Someday the creators of Wikipedia will gather all the information about humanity and fly back.
Ne4kov is!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №62117
 30.03.2012
Here are two news on Yandex:
In Kuban plans to build cannabis processing plants
Increased wind is expected in Krasnodar
Ahhhh we go!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №62116
 30.03.2012
Kolkhoz-Xenon is also harmful, of course, but the painted rear lights are also obsessed with homosexuality, and they call-TAKE ME RIGHT ON THE LIGHTOPHOR, RIGHT ON ALL!!!! to

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №62115
 30.03.2012
xxx (13:20:21 29/03/2012)
Pope Carlos planted a tree, raised a son from a tree, and built a house from a son. This is a man!
yyy (13:22:29 29/03/2012)
What am I doing? You have me right now in the process of becoming a son of a tree, and then I will make a mortgage for you.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №62114
 30.03.2012
XXX (10:57:47 29/03/2012)
Bringing fire today.
They signed a salary plan. They formed the cards.
Please - "send your account numbers in Excel or somehow"
They say – "No, in Excel we can’t"
Well we say - "no how-nt in electronic form"
In fact, there is no electronic...

YYY (10:59:31 29/03/2012)
in electronic this is a scanned printed sheet of paper )))
The wash?

XXX (10:59:52 29/03/2012)
It would be half more trouble.

YYY (11:00:02 29/03/2012)
What could be worse? ;)
Except that written by hand scanned.

XXX (11:01:12 29/03/2012)
Here is!!! to
100 of them!! 100 numbers of accounts written in hand in printed forms with names!!! to
All this with corrections, seals and signatures!
This is where people work!
We are fucking somewhat.
Someone was sitting there and handwriting the bills from the screen!

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №62113
 30.03.2012
We also recommend to you:
Man: Ring of Almighty 2 990 rubles.
Well, I already have the Ring of Almighty.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №62112
 30.03.2012
Hearing the phrase “But I’m a woman” means that the arguments ended and the cheats went on.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №62111
 30.03.2012
A friend decided to fulfill a long-time girl's dream in Thailand, riding an elephant. I beat my girlfriend so it wasn’t so bad together. A male fell in turn. The vigilant friends were afraid to sit on him - such a brutal, real macho. Specifically persuaded a couple of tourists from Germany, who walked ahead, to give in to the elephant. The guys kindly agreed and guided the girls with predatory looks in the style of "You are fantastic!" At first, everything went well - the elephant walks, the girlfriends crack, the photographer in the bushes jumps, well, the guys from behind crack. But on the descent to the muddy river, the elephant bended into a seductive posture. The elephant could not withstand and immediately took control of it. The boys were stunned by an elephant face. In the back and somewhere far above, the Germans stumbled.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №62110
 30.03.2012
A frozen morning. The sun behind the clouds. The wind chases the snowballs in the sky.
and silence. I can only hear how evil the birds who have already returned from the south.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №62109
 30.03.2012
Now in the transition between Novoslobodskaya and Mendeleevskaya, a dumb man, who presented himself as a Hindu monk, tried to inject a book for happiness))) In exchange for asking him to sacrifice something, I took it honestly and sacrificed it with the words: "Hold, friend, you have a book for happiness!"

Proof

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №62108
 30.03.2012
by VKontakte. The surgeon’s website. The status:
"I went to the operation, then I take down the photos :)"

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №62107
 30.03.2012
Conversation between two chief accountants (who are older than the other two times):
– Galina Nikolaevna, and your mother, how long can this last?! to
It’s so terrible, Tatiana Stepanovna! Strongly! Children are here!


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