bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117742
 25.08.2015
I’m the same person who "slaps" when I’m tired. No, I am not from the sales sphere, but I have to periodically work physically and carry weights. If you smile - it becomes easier, hz, what is associated with, but this is already an automatic reaction (when my mom called on the can with turf to pull, a smile automatically arose when lifting up).

No one is "forcing". Recognize to yourself that you are unhappy with the idea that no matter how the seller or waitress is asked, he is not nervous in response and does not feed the "sunny vampires" with a negative response - this is what you spit on a supposedly false smile. The smile is real. And you would just get more pleasure from someone's anger or tears, because you can feel a little like the ruler of the world.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117741
 25.08.2015
The black humor. The extreme north, mining the mine, is ahead of a professional holiday. Correspondence to VK.
Who will come on Miner's Day? (from the artists in the sense)
The refugees...

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117740
 25.08.2015
Oh oh! Young and green! I dreamed that I wanted to sleep in a warm bed in the middle of the battlefield. There is noise, noise, screams and I start to get angry. I catch the pillow and, like Sauron in the movie, scatter the fighters. And then everyone unites against me and the pillow in my hands becomes just a pillow. There is an armed army on me, and I am a fool with a pillow.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №117739
 25.08.2015
Tagged with, psychology, psychology sofa
and ==
Playing MMORPG people associate themselves with their characters. Thus e. I’m a guy, I play for a guy, because it’s "like me". And, as scientists say about such cases (again someone has investigated ;-)), you, playing for characters of opposite orientation, are latent representatives of those minorities.
and ==
I don’t know what your “scientists” say about you, but you obviously have problems when you associate yourself with the character you’re drawing. For me, when I rest, it is more pleasant to see a woman’s ass in front of my eyes than a man’s. Again, in the first online games (hello quakers oldfagams) female models were visually smaller and gave a small, but advantage.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117738
 25.08.2015
The childhood perception of songs.
In the Bremen musicians the detective sang:
"provor, e-e, makaki!
The left side of the beast."
The first line seemed foolish, and the second was something on the left of the ox. Why not right, I did not understand.
And Umka's mother sang "a loaf of snow disturbing, the night is going big" and I was sure I heard something wrong. You can’t sing that nonsense. I heard right.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117737
 25.08.2015
Funny this Roskomnadzor, the article about the charms aroused them, and articles about hashish, hemp, marijuana, ganja, cannabis and so on, etc., etc. did not touch them at all. They seem to be sitting on the same charcoal, and are worried about it.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117736
 25.08.2015
The ruble grew.
The man_s_backs on the wave of panic bought currencies again?

Thank you friend! ^ ^ ^

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №117735
 25.08.2015
The building is "Lobachevsky". It was unexpected, right? I hope the geometry is right there. : / /

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117734
 25.08.2015
From the discussion of the conflict on the road:

X: I would just strangle that fool. No need for shortcuts and ballooners. He pressed the gas and his knees bended in the opposite direction. Fuck who proves it.

YYY: Would you strangle it? Right on the sofa?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №117733
 25.08.2015
How your parents met:
At the institute, Dad asked Mom to help him with the lessons. My mom agreed, and then I learned that my dad was much smarter than he pretended.” Jenny, 7 years

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №117732
 25.08.2015
In the beginning of the article, you are very much asked not to use this instruction if you have been blocked by the administrators of Wikipedia for violating the rules of Wikipedia. =) is

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №117731
 25.08.2015
I have a question to the experts - how to get into an alternative universe, where chips live with harems of friends, months rubbing their asses for a single look? There are also, probably, milk rivers flowing and ponies flying in the sky.
Just judging by the crazy amount of men's nuts on the Internet and "split" jokes about friends, it appears that we guys have gotten off their feet, softening girls.
Only I look around in the real world and see that a crowd of single cute women are just turning around to find someone. In small cities in general, you need to catch guys already in school, at the end of the graduation, because at 20-25 all the poor, curved and dirty are disassembled.
Tell me that this wonderful world does not exist only in the brains of a single schoolboy who posts his "unimagined" friendship stories! I want to believe! Or maybe it is a club of poor ugly fans of top models who complain that the elite bodies are dynamizing them, implementing the myth of the air of friends?
So why are there so many men in parallel who "did not give no 1st date - went on"? How does it correlate?
Something straight down.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №117730
 25.08.2015
XX: Yesterday I calculated my stocks of buhl in translation for money, it turned out to be 18K rubles
XX: Light shock caroche
XXX: Well, a dofiga for a little drinking me :)
YYY: it has a special stock)))
YYY: without movement)))
YYY: no turnability
YYY: what it says about inefficient use of operating funds
ZZZ: Here is, listen to the economist))))
ZZZ: you need to swallow regularly))))

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №117729
 25.08.2015
"I am most embarrassed by loans for pensioners. This is the plague at all"

This is what "0.7% per day"? That is what there is in the contract, but judging by the rate - it will be 23% IN A MONTH! This is 1176 percent per year. And in just 2-3 years the apartment of a pensioner will become the property of the bank even for a loan of 10 trillion.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №117728
 25.08.2015
Friends told me:
We went to "Noah"
A guy was sitting behind with a large portion of popcorn and began to chew it hard, so the sound of crush-crush-crush! It was spread throughout the auditorium, with a loud echo. In response, the girl said:" He probably has an emptiness in his head!"

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117727
 25.08.2015
I read the wiki "Property in Europe". Judging from the map, it seems to me that there is some correlation between the legality of prostitution and the standard of living, but it is unclear what it depends on. However, knowing the situation in the Middle East, I dare assume that the legalization of prostitution is an important step toward the country’s well-being.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №117726
 25.08.2015
HV: from the hub from discussion "In Germany found a bottle with a note that spent 108 years in the sea"

... awaits confirmation of a record from the Guinness Book of Records. The 108-year-old message actually turned out to be the oldest bottle of notes ever found. The previous record belonged to a message found 99 years after it was sent.

DaleMartinWatson: It sounds like a challenge to the Russian Post.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №117725
 25.08.2015
I am so old that I can remember the confrontation between Villaribo and Villabajo.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117724
 25.08.2015
So I wonder why the author of the phrase " kissing a smoking woman is like licking a ashes bar " licked a ashes bar?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117723
 25.08.2015
At the expense of smiles, I go home. Improved the money for him.A day three or four you can rest.The mood is wonderful (at the end the customer left, his pregnant wife was overseeing him, you forgive me, but this is what it is).I hear:"Seroga".(I have another name).I go.Nearer.Seroga.Nearer "to stand you,be careful".I turn around.Three.Typical hoops. I say:"Error, I am not Serega".Solo with aggression:"What are you smiling at?". I already thought, if I write something to him and do his legs."Mood", I say,"Good. "Yes, there is nothing"- they turn and leave.
And quite recently. Very urgent order.It is necessary to do within a week to the weekend, without delay.The money, respectively, is also good. It’s real, but at 8 in the morning you already have to start and until 12 in the night. On Friday, there are little things left for a couple of hours.I go to 10.Forces at the end, but the mood is great.(This week you can quietly rest, which I do, and if you wish, the next).I go to buy an energetic (I know what is harmful, but sometimes I resort to them).
I-Bank Energy "Adrenaline Rush" 0.5L
I’m tired of you drug addicts (this is the turn).
I did not understand.
What you see here is smiling.
I (I did not conflict, humour to ruin yourself) - if for you a smile is associated only with drugs, then go to a psychiatrist.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna