bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №111488
 31.03.2015
XXX: As by British media, the 18-year-old Rory Siger was sentenced for attempting to rob the betting office of the bookmaker William Hill in the county of Essex in December last year.
A young man for several hours lost at a bookmaker's office £1,800 borrowed from a friend.
Not knowing how to repay the debt, he decided to rob the betting point, the regular customer of which he was.
The young man went to the nearest bakery store and bought a bowl of sardines in a tomato sauce.
Returning to the bookmaker's office, the attacker approached the box office window, and, showing him a bank with preserves, demanded money, saying that he had a bomb in his hands.
The employee did not give the money to the British and fled to the staff room.
The young man, disturbed, threw a bowl of sardines through the entire betting point and went home, where he was soon detained.

YYY: Oushan’s 14th friend.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №111487
 31.03.2015
I know three atheists. A professor at the institute, who spoke about the importance of knowing the Bible, as it is the most valuable historical document, and spares himself with quotes, explaining the differences in several languages and explaining exactly what the biblical texts overwhelm the various "energy" articles. Two other acquaintances are non-believers, very highly appreciating the cultural role, specifically wandering on tours to look at the architecture of the old temples that have survived. These are atheists.
And those anti-terrorists who on the internet start to mentally shrink and water the interlocutor’s laundry for the random reservation that the believer is religious fanatics whose religion is unbelief, in which they unthinkingly, irrationally believe. And the brains of anti-theists are usually no more than those of the elderly women who consider themselves to be the guardians of Orthodoxy, but in fact still live in the mythological era of taboos and superstitions. In their youth, these baptists could have washed out the lives of others as communists in the name of a bright communist future, now they wash out, justifying themselves with Orthodoxy and the revival of national spirituality - in fact, without changing anything in the worldview at all. Although the Komsomol and assumed a materialist view of the world. There is a special difference in the fact that those who want to dictate to others how to live and what to do, can not and can not be hanged on their flag.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №111486
 31.03.2015
It is said that in the Renaissance era, ladies had small dogs so that they could shoot, writing a confusion on a poor animal. My little devoted York clearly performs this function – always betrayally whipped when we ride in public transportation or a taxi...

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №111485
 31.03.2015
Is that how it can be with living people?
I: You are not a man. The pig. I represented it as I said it with the voice of the suricate Timon. Can I take lessons to learn to speak his voice? Talk to them on the phone, slowly making you mad. The insidious plan.
He: And you know that I really wanted to make a picture of Pumbaa on my shoulder?
I: Well, of course, because I think my plan will work. Remove that voice from my head!! to
Why am I going crazy, Timon?
I am: Melting! Now I read you with the voice of Pumbaa! Stop it!
He is Timothy!!! to
I am: Melting!


[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №111484
 31.03.2015
Religious addictions are like sex organs. Everyone has them, but not everyone ticks them around in the face, calls to join their sex.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №111483
 31.03.2015
"Only one did not see that Orthodox ones were imposed on someone."
_____
Opa... this means that atheists recently organized parades with icons... and slogans "Orthodoxy or death!"...

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №111482
 31.03.2015
Valin0k: This is strange. All day walked around the places of fame of Jack the Destroyer, listened in detail to the stories of all the horrors of the time, and the most terrible thing remembered for the day is the phrase "in London, the hipster industry employs more than 150 thousand people."

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №111481
 31.03.2015
Are you confused with Europe??? Even the kings did not know how to read or write. And in the unwashed Russia, even under Ivan the Terrible, schools were built under churches.
--------
Fuck, whom did the Bolsheviks then teach at the Lycbes courses? The European kings.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №111480
 31.03.2015
We are just trolls!
Yes, we have profits :)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №111479
 31.03.2015
Photos of men from a dating site:
- with a buckle (with an emphasis on a buckle): beer, vodka, cognac and other...;
- topless, with breasts size 4, puzo - like a globe swallowed, accompanied by unfolded legs, like eggs like breasts;
- on the shells (looking at the same time as at a bomb);
In the car or in the car (look, baby, what a cool car I have);
- abroad (a mountain or temple grows from the head);
- on the beach (filmed on a cell phone) or in the sea, where the body contours are poorly guessed, the face is not visible at all;
- with wife and children (:) on the dating site! What are they counting on?
with caught fish;
A killed bird.
90% of the pictures.
Thanks to the remaining 10% where you can see the person, not the "fourth left in the hat I lay"


[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №111478
 31.03.2015
Naturally, then he whispered a couple of spells and everything went well, and there was no difference where the money and the car came from.
....
This topic was well played in one very famous computer game about post-apocalypse.
You steal an object, you get minus ten karmas (conditionally, I don’t remember the exact value), you sell, you sacrifice money to any of the churches, you get plus fifteen karmas.
This is in addition to the fact that all the churches presented in the game are rarely inadequate

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №111477
 31.03.2015
"If you go with such an inscription, it is read as "I am an atheist and I had you all in my mouth". No wonder that strangers don’t like it. For the same reason, by the way, and gay parades do not like."
_______________________
This is read as "the atheist". Because otherwise, I can make such conclusions that you are fooling. You wear short hair under the machine - you cut under the military, the same square nest. You wear a model haircut - a half-pedor of some sort, a normal man will not do so. You wear long hair – Pidor, of course. Lusty - poser some, under the mud you cut.
Wear an office costume. Wearing jeans is tasteless. Wear a sporting suit, anyway.
You have an iPhone. Samsung is a horse. The Chinese Samsung is a misery. Button 3310 - fuck you bad, even poorer than the previous one.
And so to infinity. To tell people what they should wear is a shit. We live in the 21st century. The state is secular.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №111476
 31.03.2015
"Observing the body movements"

**********************
Do you not understand? The boy is writing.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №111475
 31.03.2015
I remember, in a women’s consultation, one lady worried that she was sitting in a row for a long time, because the chiefs were unhappy with her permanent retreats, and could be fired for constant retreats. I tell her that they may not have the right to dismiss you on any article, except on their own // She shattered her head - no, we can.
In general, I have concluded that it is impossible to raise from the knees of a person who prefers to stand with cancer, and no longer with education in the masses.
and----

It is not necessary to throw away the accusations that someone is supposed to have cancer (unlike you, obviously). There are such employers who actually dismiss anyone at the request of the left heel, and when trying to judge they are dumb revenge, cruel and sophisticated. One pregnant woman so stumbled into the hospital and walked there before giving birth with the threat of miscarriage – she was scared by three frostbite near the house when she wrote a lawsuit to the court. I do not wish anyone to be in her place, but believe me, you will think a hundred times, and if the law and justice of your health is worth it.

Cut your nose already: there are no perfect laws anywhere in the world, and you can encounter inadequate everywhere. Sometimes you can only restore justice without risk to yourself by moving away from the boss psychic, but not everyone has such opportunities.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №111474
 31.03.2015
Not the salary, but some, forgive gods, fucking shit.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №111473
 31.03.2015
Yes, explain to me, and also to others, which of the gods invented for thousands of years must be believed in order not to lose everything?

Omnition of Warhammer.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №111472
 31.03.2015
xxx: if Jackson starts filming Silmarillion, I don’t know what I’ll do with it =) I’ll send an ice cut by mail =))
Luke is going to go fucking away.
XXX: He will have to justify for Shelob. There, her mother-in-law, Ungolianta, drank the ocean and snacked the continents. Well, and Sauronchik, the junior assistant of the senior guardian of the pot of Morgot. I just don’t know how this can be screened. There the word "epos" will need to be placed in the size of the moon, and displayed in molecules for 40 years. Then it will compare.
xxx: And you will have to explain somehow how one of the seven istars Gandalf, who was a helper of valars moving continents and stars in the sky, got to this form =)
YYYYYYYYYYYY :)
Maybe Jackson is right. Having made Radagast a half-foolish idiot, he would say, “Look at the helpers of those who created our universe.” Are there questions still?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №111471
 31.03.2015
I don’t know how you do, but when we are recruited, the boss and the employees sign the contract.
— — —
which is recognized by the court as invalid if it is inconsistent with the current legislation of the Russian Federation. Like any other contract.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №111470
 31.03.2015
We have one employee who never runs, although he runs around the departments and will always fit into the holiday. (I think there will be such people in everyone) Today we congratulated him: "We congratulate you on your birthday. We want to eat the cake, and you stop being a slug because you will not earn all the money." We found an old postcard, congratulating you on the new year of 2008. It was written on her birthday, drawn and handed over.
The cake was not expected.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №111469
 31.03.2015
~ArchimeD~: fucking like the managers. How loud they are.
~ArchimeD~: Through the headphones
spiritual☭scream: active noise.
spiritual☭scrub: buy it you will not regret. Sometimes they start to make noise.
~ArchimeD~: active noise suppression is to get up and shoe :)

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