I decided to clean "Friends" VTentakli. There were about 300 people. With the scream "This is SPARTA!", everyone flew out of the contact list. There are 60 people. I thought, and with the words: " And these me in real life brain eat" removed the page. This is what I call "remove a couple of extra people"

In the morning, in a very realistic dream, I tasted sandwiches with red and black caviar. The taste, the smell, the texture – as it is! I slept at work. The alarm clock did not ring for an unknown reason. I probably regretted.

Shoes in October? You won’t see that in our town.

On the spotlight stands a girl in a half-shirt and boots, which is held by a guy in a T-shirt, shorts and sandals.
Both argue amusingly who of them is the bigger fool, they ended up agreeing that both.

Top comment to the video "Course":
Why not toned?

YYYY :
A girl greeted a friend on the wall.
Happy Birthday! Let it not be cold even in the fierce frosts from the ashes of your loved ones.)

On the wall of the VK:
"Neighbors are in need of...
Selling a 1-room apartment to Gypsies or Uzbek (Tajik, Azerbaijan)
A large family buffet as a gift!
Even better if they are followers of satanism, working in turn in day shifts, leading an antisocial and night lifestyle, fans of BDSM..."

Do you disinfect?
and yes!
Customer with sensitive skin, do you have quality materials?
and yes!

The next day, the client is all in the acne and itches, and the barley matures on the eye.

What fucking thing? How did you clean the tools?
Why clean them? Chestnuts of goat.

Recently, life has been reminiscent of Tetris. Falling figures (affairs) should be able to fit in the free intervals (time). The main difference, game over can occur at any time, i.e. In principle any.

If the husband who came after the corporation suddenly struck you, sexually, then with Lenka from the accounting office he broke up.

The family lunch. Grandma is supposed to be at the head of the table. He teaches his grandchildren who are already in their thirties.
You do not owe anyone now. We owe it to the state! It is according to plan, according to plan. You choose, you do it yourself. You do not owe anyone!
Silence at the table.
The voice of my grandson.
We owe the banks, the grandmothers, the banks.

There is such a mess on the roads now. It is terrible to buy.

xxx: Bl..., I still remember that I agreed with one girl in the kindergarten, that we will show each other, I showed her, and she didn’t.
YYY: And I showed it :) And it wasn’t bad. I remember when we were playing at the hospital, one girl was too clever and said her arm was hurt, but we persuaded her, we better knew she was hurt. Healed that is there.

A survey conducted by the Russian Orthodox Statistics Service in July 2013 among people who refer to themselves as atheists showed an extremely low level of cultural development.
So, on the question where the temple is located, only 4% of respondents were able to answer correctly.
The text "Our Father" could remember only 19% of the total number of respondents.
None of the respondents were able to correctly answer the question of what is allowed to eat on Thursday of the 5th week of Lent.
What is Jordan, were able to answer 24%.
Only 2% of respondents were able to list the names of all the apostles.
The results of the survey on other issues were also very disappointing. Experts suggest that such a low level of knowledge is due to the fact that too few classes on the Basics of Orthodox Culture are held in schools, and in some schools they are not held at all. Likewise, the lack of basic knowledge about the culture of Russia experts associate with the growing campaign to discredit Orthodoxy, which is conducted presumably on the order of the US State Department.

Buried every 100 years is not the most interesting thing that can happen to the deceased. Some of the dead are dismembered by the RPC after the excavation, and these pieces are transported throughout the country.

Hearing voices is already one of the signs of schizophrenia.
Instead of hearing voices is one of the signs of deafness.

We recently visited the U.D.O. concert. We approach the turn to the club, two guys also come in front of us, one of them in a pretty strong support. They stood in line, and there was this dialogue between them:
The first (which is in submission): "And why are we here? Let’s go there!" (Hands on the box)
The second: "Why?"
The first (with a typical intonation for a drunk): "Why??? For the tickets!and "
The second: "We have tickets!"
First (with the feeling of the deepest surprise): "Do we have tickets?and "
The second is "You bought it!"
The first (surprising even more): "I BUYED???and "
The second (showing tickets): "Well, here are they."
The first gets a bunch of money deposited on tickets, looks at it for a long time, divides it approximately equally and tries to get half of the companion.
The second is "Why? I owe it to you"
The first (surprise stumbles): "You owe me money???". Then he stands, thinks something, looks again at the coined pile of money, and says, "We have tickets, and you owe me money. Oh yeah yeah!and "

Good day
Good day!
I need a photo.
What document do you have?
I do not know...
In what format?
Just like documents.
In what documents?
In the usual...
- There is no such concept as "ordinary documents", what format should the photo be?
- Well... * painting a rectangle in the air * - this is what it is!
– Here, look at the samples of photos, what format do you do?
Just like the documents...
In what documents? What format?
I told you – I don’t know!
I have to guess what photo you want, right?
You are a photographer...
Where do you need this photo? Where will you put it in?
I told you – I don’t know!! to

After the holiday, the taxes came by mail. At work, I remove the residues from the card, throw them on my phone and distribute them by expenditure articles. Okay, I think I will go on lunch break to pay taxes, and at the same time I will save lunch money. Everything was thrown with accuracy to a multimeter - 2 payments in the FSN and 140 r. to the child on the phone. No matter, we will survive.
I go to Sberbank, it’s closest to us all. I enter 1 payment, I pay and I want to pay the 2nd with the balance, but it wasn't here.I go to the re-turn, and the terminal is always evading somewhere wrong, and it already has my money. Please wait and go to the consultant. The puffy boy, unwillingly, explained to me that a considerable balance can only be transferred to the phone, and it is impossible to pay a second tax with this money, you need to make other notes. clearly. Apparently, this program is so well written.
I would have noticed that you could hang an ad about this at the terminal, but why bother yourself.

To the wrong-handed man who loaded such a shame into the terminals, I really want to wish that when he goes to the store with the last note 3 days before his salary to buy food, he suddenly wanted to go to the toilet. He will stretch his last pencil to his grandmother at the entrance, and she will fall into some gap with her trembling pencil and say, "Sorry, granddaughter, it's not the season - there is no surrender. Don't be upset, think that you bought a subscription from us, you can go to us for a whole month unlimited."
And he who forgets the announcement, always meet him like him when performing.

Country of action: Baranistan
Install a code lock at the entrance. A housewife passes by and sees this fact.
With an astonished look, he asks:
The code castle? How will the children come in? Print the lock code and hang it on the door.

I work as a driver in a taxi, calling at 4-00 a.m. the girl is sad: Girl, and you can leave (pause...and in the background a fun and very drunk guy's voice) - nahuy from this colloquium!!!! to