bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №126651
 10.04.2016
I rarely ride the subway today, but it happened yesterday. After the local backpacking bark immediately struck in the eye - people remove backpacks, put in their legs or knees if they sit. Whether all cultures are like that, or the pockets are afraid.
Who then here with the foam in the mouth defended his right not to take off the backpack anywhere?
The Nippon...

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №126650
 10.04.2016
D as friends.

Well, in the end, I got fired because I was supposed to be transferred to restoration, but the money for my training was lost.
Where are they lost?
The director is Pidoris.
and AAA.
He gave the money to his lover.
Two of us:
Oh, in that sense.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №126649
 10.04.2016
Translation of:

Collectors of the non-Russian language:
He did not go solo, but bread."

He stumbled and stumbled on the grandmother.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №126648
 10.04.2016
The most extensive agribusiness of the world with its hierarchy, primitive legislation and emerging culture

It’s an uncomfortable feeling when the mole hits you on your heels in development.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №126647
 10.04.2016
We agreed with the children that we will watch a Soviet cartoon about Mowgli tonight.
Later in the evening, my daughter reminded me:
We were going to watch a prehistoric cartoon.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №126646
 10.04.2016
The provider called yesterday. He says there is no signal.
What signal I never knew, but the provider learned that I am not his customer for more than 3 months.

[ + 15 - ] Comment quote №126645
 10.04.2016
oSpa: I love the telecast - I go out of the sort, and there everyone applauds

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №126644
 10.04.2016
Oh, the backpacker is meaningless and merciless!

I often use a backpack, I often see people with backpacks. I have never been disturbed by people with backpacks.

If the backpack is heavy and large, people will think about how to put it.
No one is swirling with a backpack. No one beats them. No one runs with a backpack around the salon, they usually walk slowly. They are in the corner on the way.
The only situation where they can hit this sharp braking.

If the backpack is small with a bottle of water, then you can forget about it. Does not bother at all. By the way, I usually have an empty tablet to read on the road.

Takes a place? The bag and the suitcase will be taken. And under the legs will bother even stronger, because it is not visible.

Stop the suffering, right?

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №126643
 10.04.2016
All started with the fact that in addition to VIP clients (very important person)
We have VOP (very OHRENEVSHI person) clients.

VoIP (very OHRENENNO important person)
and VIOP (very important OHRENEVSHI person)

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №126642
 10.04.2016
From the discussion of the article about the strongest solar flashes, able to disrupt electronics, satellites and disrupt electricity supply.
I feel a magical storm on the sun a day before it begins on earth.
Is it a gift of prediction?...
ууу: please, unsubscribe for a day before what is predicted in the article, so that I can buy diesel solars without agitation.

[ + 21 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126641
 10.04.2016
This is:

@I’m not that girl, but a bearded programmist, but what’s like in a restaurant backpack?

IMHO, if you do not pour out of the backpack under the table, do not fold the tableware and dishes into it, do not sit with it on the back at the table and especially do not dance, then nothing.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126640
 10.04.2016
In the neighboring point of sale of the spill was an action: when buying 4 liters of glass as a gift.
xxx: Now came, hanging a new ad: when buying a 5 litre glass as a gift.
In our country, even the price of the glass is falling.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №126639
 10.04.2016
Under Stalin, the working day was 7 hours.

Oh, yes - 5 days at 7 hours, and another Saturday - 6. It was called Six Days. Total of 41 hours.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №126638
 10.04.2016
We work in an enterprise of increased danger, with machines. Somewhere 10 years ago, Leha’s friend grabbed three fingers on his hand, and recently the story repeated itself, leaving only one. Leha actively lies on the third cup, suddenly cleverly smiles, and hides the same hand behind her back. He sneezes, and smiles: "Guess how many fingers!"

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №126637
 10.04.2016
A true comedy talent is the ability to make fun of a multi-thousand hall without using the word "Jop".

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №126636
 10.04.2016
Doctor Moriarty:

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

The darkness. Shakes and shakes warp. Something like a portal window in space: you can see it below (up? The right? on the left? [...] He gives the duel to Kylie Reno. Problems of lightning, the silhouette of a figure in a dark suit with a cap, distorted by thunder and thunder, but the recognizable voice of Senator Palpatine:

They fucking! Forget all myths!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №126635
 10.04.2016
Quantum Break is out. From the description:

✔ Hard Disk Space: 68 GB
✔ In order for the game not to fly out after the launch you need to put it on the system drive.

xxx: The same feeling when the system drive is an SSD for 60 gigs, of which only 10 are free...

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №126634
 10.04.2016
The sports.

"For our biathletes to start winning, their skies need to start lubricating with meldonium!"

Zzzz: No, do not ski. Not the melatonin.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №126633
 10.04.2016
X: Well, I’m listening to the Time Machine, Antonova.
Y: Yeah, you are a 40-year-old star.
z: I’m listening to Beethoven and Bach sometimes, I’m MacLaud!

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №126632
 10.04.2016
XX: You take into account that we are very different. We think differently. The man is the vector and the woman is the medium.
UCU: Wednesday, Friday and Monday?
Friday, as the only satellite of all the Robinsons, and Monday, as the inevitable shit?

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