bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №9211
 20.08.2008
On Yaroslavl television in the 90s there was a man-legend Anatoly Pechkov - a news host, who before the broadcast came into the studio and secretly adjusted the camera so that he, Pechkov, was larger in the frame. When this case was passed, they wrapped the zoom on the camera with a scotch, so that Anatoly did not go where he shouldn't go. Anatoly, in response, invented a new chip: he slowly, until nobody sees, began to move the camera itself together with the staff closer to his desk. When they noticed this (hule, not the fools are sitting - it can be seen that the picture differs from the approved standard), the camera was stopped (that is, it was now impossible to ride on the floor on the wheels) and strictly forbade Anatoly to touch the equipment.

Anatoly went away from the shock for a week, and then came up with a new diversion: every day, centimeter by centimeter, he began to move his table (fortunately, by the way, healthy) along with the chair closer and closer to the chamber :)

and fat (c)

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №9210
 20.08.2008
by Whirlwind:
Humanities around

Oldry Goodwind
rggg

Oldry Goodwind
In our computer company, no one works for them. Educational

Oldry Goodwind
and no

Oldry Goodwind
Three farmers

Oldry Goodwind
Zootechnics

by Whirlwind:
Ugu, attached to humanitarian, ordinary practice

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №9209
 20.08.2008
Topics about cellphones and mobile phones:
senseless_guy : Give your phone and go on.
The_toon: Why give it right away? help me! Let me call your mom, Simka, yes. And from the garages it is better to catch, we go there...
senseless_guy : See also The whole business plan is in three proposals.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №9208
 20.08.2008
XBuddy
I understand why women don’t hold hands.

XBuddy
They have ticks.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №9207
 20.08.2008
XXX is Baaaa! by Oleg!!!! Hi to you!

YYY: Hell to welcome you!

Don’t write that anymore, I’m scared.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №9206
 20.08.2008
Talk to a friend about yesterday’s date:

thx(10:37:58 18/08/2008)
Okay, have you seen the movie?

Wicked(10:38:16 18/08/2008)
and [

Wicked(10:38:19 18/08/2008)
I also drank beer.

thx(10:38:36 18/08/2008)
So what more?)

Wicked(10:39:34 18/08/2008)

and [
Wicked(10:39:41 18/08/2008)
I also broke his hand.

Wicked(10:39:45 18/08/2008)
He is afraid of me now.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №9205
 20.08.2008
Russia consumes only one and a half kilograms of toilet paper per capita per year, which is approximately four times less than in Eastern Europe and 10 times less than in Western Europe and the United States, according to the company Svenska Cellulosa (SCA).

According to the company, Hungarians and Czechs use an average of about 6 kg of paper per person per year, Western Europeans - about 17 kg per person, and Americans - more than 20 kg per person per year.

"In part, this is due to the culture of consumption: in Russia it is customary to fold paper when used, and in America - to fold into a large piece," explained the general director of the Russian representation of SCA Timothy Sokolenko.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №9204
 20.08.2008
<Happy_kamikaze> now my girlfriend made me an offer that I would offer her to marry me and have a child 0_o o_0

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №9203
 20.08.2008
Let’s play Doom2.
Chur, I am a sink!
Am...

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №9202
 20.08.2008
Nevertheless, the work of Sisadmin is ungrateful - the prize was given not for the Linux server raised as soon as possible, but for the new "easy" printed form in 1C.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №9201
 20.08.2008
Evil of the day. From one of the forums, discussion of a new cassette (vacuum) bomb:

And my friends, always so. The Americans will spend three-and-a-half infinity of dollars, make terrible cruise missiles, and our own will re-equip a washing machine factory and a plastic doll factory. And then at the price of a box of vodka will produce something unimaginable... a doll washer, for example.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №9200
 20.08.2008
Olesya: In his company who lives here for 10 years, who lives here for 15 - there is a word in Russian, 10 in English.
I know what the word is :D

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №9199
 20.08.2008
I have a labador, the dog of the best soul, but since big and black, everyone is afraid, especially if we encounter in the elevator... the question that bored me:
Will he not eat?
began to answer:
No, but I have eaten.
and :)

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №9198
 20.08.2008
luv2every1 ‎(12:37 AM):
Everything is stupid...
Alina ‎(12:37 AM):
ridiculously
Alina ‎(12:38 AM):
Women are smarter than men!!!! to
It was written in the last cosmopolitan.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №9197
 20.08.2008
Sometimes you have to pretend to be a fool in order not to look like an idiot.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №9196
 20.08.2008
What is broadcast on the Internet from Olympiad is very different from the picture on TV.
For example, what is cut by advertising:
Hearing a monologue.
"Moscow answer!"
"we have a technical break here... the tennis player forgive me to write... I too with your permission go" :))))

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №9195
 20.08.2008
I had to take a blood test, and before it, as you know, you can’t eat. So I put a alarm on my phone to remind me that I shouldn’t have breakfast. Since the signs of intersection are poorly perceived, I was very surprised by the inscriptions: Analysis! not eat

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №9194
 20.08.2008
Bard: The true street magic is not when something or someone is bored by a dude in the hood, but when at night you go to the ghetto and return home whole, so also with a mobile phone, money and a player.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №9193
 20.08.2008
It was crazy today.)
Today I was called to the Prosecutor’s Office (P) as an accused (I am the director of one of the firms).
The call:
P is Hi!
I am Hi!
P – Here is your company’s statement bla-bla-bla...
Enter the PJ. Today at 4 o’clock.
I am good. I will.
I’ll leave you my mobile number. You will call me when I leave. Then suddenly I will be out. Or I will call you.
Although not. You call yourself. Otherwise I will forget. I will definitely forget.
I am okay, goodbye.

I sit now and think they can't ride a cock? He will surely forget...

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №9192
 20.08.2008
Never give friends a large sum of money in debt. It kills friendship. And no matter how upset you were before, when you find yourself in a deep ass, on the brink of a prison, your ex-friend will just throw you away. Send to Nash. Even though you saved him in exactly the same situation. Isn’t it true, dear Kharkov Yura Naumov?

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