My friend and I discuss the advantages and disadvantages of dating sites. A friend's guest is a grandmother, who is listening to us and suddenly reveals: in our country, Dinka-divorced 15 years ago, too, on an announcement in the newspaper, met Zack. Year was rewritten. What letters he wrote to her! The whole village read, the grandmothers almost cried out of jealousy. He immediately came to her from prison. True, scary, but polite, always walked with Dinka under the pen, opened the door to her. A month later, he got drunk and broke her two legs.
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The joke happened today.
Turantat: In the morning a person rested, and accordingly with tight skin
Turantat: + I did not eat
Turantat: + trained
Turantat: The cubes passed slightly
I went home without a shirt. A woman went to meet me, and a man was just 20 meters behind me.
Turantat: I look at a woman honestly watching me like a vibrator.
Turantat: I passed by.
Turantat: Suddenly I hear a sharp sound from behind: "DONNNNNNNN"! I turn around, and I see a woman, rubbing her forehead, moving away from the lantern. I look at the man with a smile. He says "The EU! All my life I wanted to see this, only the example with women".
Turantat: In a good mood went to shower

The kids put on carnival cowboy hats, took pistols and ran around the house. They approach everyone in turn, say “hands up,” do a piff-paf and run away with noise. They all seem to have passed. It was "All! And now give up your guns, hats and sleep!" Kids, choir: "Net! The other"
Grandma absolutely serious and in a hurry: "Then quickly shoot grandfather and run to sleep."

and there:
to this:
and...
My husband betrayed yesterday. ... :

"You have eyes of the same color as the wool that was supposed to grow on the ears of Vity Korneev from "Monday begins on Saturday" - red with green.

...
– – – – –
Give your husband to read and not to offend Vitka. The wire of Korneev is a true magician, and the wool on the ears grew in the outdoors and outdoors around the science.
– – – – –
The primary sources, nub:
“Vitya,” said Edik, “your hair will grow on your ears.
“Red,” I said angrily. Maybe even with green.

I think I have prostate cancer :(
YYY: What is it?
Well, I had a fever and lost appetite, and I decided to see what these symptoms were on the Internet. Everything goes together, I checked for a few more symptoms.
YYY: I don’t want to upset you.

xxx: Something I have some wrong reaction to peanut. I don’t want to fuck him, I want to fuck him.
Yeah, you don’t have it with a cut.

and Fellifein:
Mish and I once married my husband
Why did you buy me flowers?
I would have bought a servette :D
Funny when he looked at me.
I gave my flowers and my sausages in them.
My favorite was :D

You know, El Salvador Dali and Gala held a rabbit in the yard of their home in Port Liguria as a pet. When it was time to leave, Gala prepared him and they ate him so as not to break up with his favorite.
ant_anna: I read about the cruelty and heartlessness of those who read this. They just never held rabbits!! to

to this:

Anton: IT company, fucking...
Daniel: Oh, that is a good thing!
Anton: Someone turned on a Disney channel in the kitchen. half-office stuck in the kitchen, sitting looking at the black coat...
by Daniel: =)

This is something else, we have a sugar cotton machine in our office, and when we write: "Ice in the refrigerator" a crowd of programmers runs through the hallway.

I don’t understand why it has become fashionable among the ladies to post quotes and cry out to the world in every way that they have read “Fifty Shades of Grey.” This is porn. I don’t write to everyone: yesterday I watched “lesbian girlfriends or hot schoolgirls” 4 – Jessica, you conquered me!

xxx: presses the shutdown button, the computer asks: save the document? She says yes, the computer turns off while saving the document, after which Mom turns on the computer. The Profit!
_________________________
And you be a good son and try to teach your mom to graze the red cross in the upper right corner, the effect is the same, and you do not need to restart the computer. and :)

Yesterday on the beach an announcement in the roof from the rescue tower:
Man return to the swimming area, do not force the sniper to target :crazy:

One man crashed into the other car on his foot. Stories in Faces
I take the bag from the front and take the bag from the back. Then the car turned, he hit my foot and stopped.
“I look at all this and tell him, ‘Couldn’t you be so kind and carefully remove your car from my foot?’ It hurts a bit"

The second companion is right now. I ask, was it all so?
FIG is there! The most decent things that sounded in those 15 seconds were the words "you" and "my leg")

Recently, the Russian Post has increasingly reminded me of June’s watches from the "Children of Spies". The clock could do anything, but not show the time.

Forced treatment is subject to patients who cannot at the moment understand the meaning of what is happening, but are not incapable.
YYY: I don’t understand the meaning of the 30s as
Yyy: Where is my compulsory treatment???? to
Where is Morphine?

Eliminate illegal content on the Internet!
Restoring the pirate market!

Says this:
I listen to the weather forecast on the radio: the probability of rainfall is 67%. Go on, the dictator from the mahatma :-)

It is right:
The dictator makes the weather forecast.
A person operating with numbers not multiplied by 10 is a physics mathematician
The seller of the store is responsible for the unflavored sausage (incl. For your subjective taste.
- in the crowded public transportation, if necessary, only you go, the rest used to it from nothing to do
Buying a car for 2,000 U.S. dollars. And having killed it in 6 years of operation, you want to sell it for 1900, claiming that I bought it for 2. You won’t buy this car for 500.
You always have the "guilty bench", you are always a "chic fool". Turn your brain on, it’s time.

This is a story told by a familiar doctor.
Before our era. An old man is coming. A sabloned tiger. Adrenaline is increased. He is ready to act. To escape, give the tiger an oak on the head. During physical activity, the level of adrenaline decreases.
2 of our days. A man goes to the office. A sabloned boss jumped on him. Adrenaline is increased. And lower it at all. Or give the boss a moustache or go smoke.

Are you so afraid of piracy? I’m going to write music on the radio ?
------------
Have you listened to radio for a long time?

Qx87: How did you start working?
Dragonpetrovich: Oh fuck
Dragonpetrovich: I don’t even want to remember
dragonpetrovich: it was such an epic fuck
dragonpetrovich: more accurately
dragonpetrovich: epic is not true
Dragonpetrovich: It was a sad shit.
Drake: his first 2 "works"
dragonpetrovich: yes and the third too
dragonpetrovich: yes and the fourth
DragonPetrovich: Fucking
Dragonpetrovich: Okay you asked.