bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 16 - ] Comment quote №128018
 12.05.2016
Kylie: It’s going to be a third series, and there’s no sex yet. Cersei without a glass in his hand the whole series, well what it is... The series is running!

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №128017
 12.05.2016
And kiss me everywhere, I’m 18 already!
XXX is there. one time.
Yyy: You can kiss everywhere from 16.
XXX is everywhere.
YYY: In Russia everywhere. It was possible from 14.
I always thought I was only 18. My wife and I watched it, it was 18 years ago.
That’s not what I did when I was 16!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №128016
 12.05.2016
XXX: the vector hit, even had to open the unloved in principle genre of video lessons
And to not be boring, in a small window above all this vector - films. Garic and the Order of the Phoenix are fighting with the eaters.
XX: The dictator says: we will try another way of cutting the contour. Outline the arc and all objects nearby, then apply...
..and here in the neighboring window (and the left ear))) Bellatrix Lestrange, standing near the mysterious arc in the mini-magic, targeted Sirius Black with a stick and spoke: "Avatar the Cedar!"
XX: And in the window with the lesson, the dictator continued:..and here we have everything cut as it should be.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №128015
 12.05.2016
>>>Where, well, where is it written here about slowing down speed?

Is it necessary to step down the road without decreasing the speed? O_O
MSI knows a lot.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №128014
 12.05.2016
An uncle in the bank signs a loan agreement.On his hands he is given a pile of papers, where on each page you just need to put a signature.
Uncle: What to write?
Bank Officer: Register as in the passport
Uncle diligently blows over the papers for 10 minutes, and then returns the documents to the employee of the bank.That does "Rukalico" and with the words "o goddess!",slides under the table.On each page instead of the painting was painted the inscription "How in the passport".

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №128013
 12.05.2016
I work as a manager, so my way of talking on the phone is quite specific. I always say hello, find out if it is convenient to speak, and only then I sound what I actually call. Not only at work - with personal calls the same stuff. Just on the machine.

So I picked up my number and said:

and good day. Are you comfortable talking?

And I am answered:

“No, girl, we don’t need anything, don’t name here, forget this number... and they throw the phone.

I just wanted to order sushi.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №128012
 12.05.2016
Oh yeah, it’s true, the 99-year-olds are already 17 years old.
WOW: I will say more, people born 17 years old are 99 years old.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №128011
 12.05.2016
A helicopter fired at a house near Poroshenko estate.

Q: Are you confused?
Yyy: No, the neighbor was loud with the perforator.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №128010
 12.05.2016
The 99-year-olds are already 17 years old.

Where did all that time go?

And that was your life.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128009
 12.05.2016
Are the terms "non-handmade" and "non-finger crafted" synonymous?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №128008
 12.05.2016
From the discussion of traffic jams in online maps

Buy a car! They said. You will be able to travel quickly and comfortably around the city. They said. and (
This is one of the reasons why I’m on the train.
I will buy a car closer to the light!
I sell a seat in the tram.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №128007
 12.05.2016
Remember the old cartoon about a coyote who was chasing a bird? There, the coyote carries on the top of the ribbon, runs to the abyss and continues to run for a while, and then suddenly looks down and discovers that it runs in the air?
Well well?
“You know,” he says, “I’ve always wondered what would happen, don’t look him down. Would the air remain the same hard until it reaches the opposite end? I think I would stay, and I still think the same thing happens to all of us. We strive forward, through the breach, without turning our eyes away from the things that matter, but then something – some fears, some uncertainty – forces us to look down. And then we realize that we are running in the air, we are panicked, and we turn and break our heads back. And if they didn’t look down, they would just run over to the other side. Where there is what matters.

Jonathan Tropper, “The Book of Joe”

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №128006
 12.05.2016
Comment on the video where GDP plays hockey:
I didn’t know he was running hockey...I’t be surprised if I met him in the Dota.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128005
 12.05.2016
XX: 6 hours Give up everything, go home.
YYY: I can’t, I have to finish it once I’ve started, because... because nobody but me will do it.
Xxx: If nobody does it, then nobody needs it.
YYY : Hm You are right, that’s shit. by Valim.
And so two superheroes moved away, leaving the city to die under the influence of fascist alien zombie mutants.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №128004
 12.05.2016
Continues the reception to the church of witnesses of the Air Conditioner.Please turn in front of the church of Easter witnesses.Crossing the road, protect yourself.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №128003
 12.05.2016
Kubik: Fuck all the reasonable arguments, it’s much easier to say "First get it".
Gleb: Bernard Shaw was able to judge the taste of an egg, not having been able to lay a single egg.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №128002
 12.05.2016
Do you play for blood elves?
I mean yes)))
All girls love elves ;)
I love elves because in the third characters improved they shot twice XD

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №128001
 12.05.2016
Juliette has a gun: If there are no problems with the heart, try bikram yoga. 26 poses at a 40-degree temperature. It can also be called "hot", there are some tricks with a trade mark. But not just some flow in a heated room, namely 26 poses and in a 40-degree room. In the regular classes, no one has yet lost weight. But it is difficult, straight bullying.
TolstyiKot: And what, then, are there survivors?
Jigurnet: I think the meaning of this yoga is that after hitting yourself and these 26 poses at 40 degrees, you begin to love yourself somehow more: and your ass is no longer so thick, and your legs are nothing, and this yoga at all. ;D

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №128000
 12.05.2016
XXX: The Crisis
xxx: We even have dinner in the morning turns into a club "com for 50";
Whoever has a ZP below 50k can’t afford to have breakfast there :(

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №127999
 12.05.2016
If you want to see true, unfake pain, anger, fear, outbreak, sorrow and suffering, then go to the children's clinic in the morning. Where the blood test is taken from the finger...

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